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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27752182">it's not the same anymore</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lagunaindigo/pseuds/lagunaindigo'>lagunaindigo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, DNF, Depression, Disapperance, Dream and George, Hate, Internal Conflict, Love, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Minecraft, No Smut, Panic Attack, Self-Hatred, Slow Burn, dreamnotfound</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:43:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>23,669</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27752182</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lagunaindigo/pseuds/lagunaindigo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>after things become too much, dream shuts down. he doesn't know what to do. so he decides to ignore it by walking away from everything. sick with worry, george desperately tries to reach out to dream to no avail. there has to be something he can do. determined to talk to him, george decides to do something that dream can't ignore. </p><p> </p><p>inspired by the song: it's not the same anymore by rex orange county.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>72</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>393</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. 16 voicemails.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/tbhyourelame/gifts">tbhyourelame</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>@dream: </b>
  <em>
    <span>thank you so much for all the concern and support. there are things that are happening that are beyond my control. i need to step away for a while. i need time. i will be back eventually, until then thank you so much. i love you and will see you soon. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After hitting send, Dream let his phone drop onto the pillow next to him. He had spent hours mulling over what to say about his absence. The fear of what his fans might say unsettled him. He didn’t want to upset anyone but he couldn’t keep lying to them. He felt the tweet was enough to satisfy their worries for the time being.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The vibrations of his phone pulled him out of his thoughts. Turning over, he saw it was George calling him. He must have seen the tweet. Dream reached to answer the call but he stopped himself. The overwhelming desire to talk to George was suppressed by the thought of having to explain everything. He knew that George would ask questions that Dream himself didn’t know how to answer. The mess in his head didn’t make any sense to him either.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George was only worried after all. Dream had cut contact with everyone almost two weeks ago. No matter how hard everyone of his friends tried, no one could reach him. Dream made no attempt to respond back to any of the messages. The only people he had actually been in contact with was his family. His mom had contacted him frantically after receiving messages from his friends. He explained to her that everything was fine and he just needed to be by himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dream noticed the buzzing had stopped, a loud ding came from his phone. George had left a voicemail. It was the fifteenth one if Dream was correct. It wasn’t like Dream didn’t listen to the voicemails or read the messages sent to him, he just didn’t respond to them. Every time he went to write back a response, his ability to form any semblance of a sentence escaped him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He didn’t know how to explain what happened. Why he had walked away from everything or why he couldn’t bring himself to respond to anyone. All he knew was that it all became too much. The barrier he held up to protect himself from all the hate broke down. It was like something snapped inside himself and he didn’t even know how to go about fixing it. He just knew he couldn’t do it anymore.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So he walked away from it. He deleted any social media app he had on his phone. He avoided his computer as much as he could. Instead, choosing to spend time doing tasks around the house, watching tv or simply doing nothing. In his mind, if he got rid of the bridge between him and the hate, then maybe it would all go away. People would stop coming after him. He would be able to recover mentally and come back stronger. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But it didn’t. After a week of no social media and no minecraft, Dream felt better than he had in a long time. The monotony his days held of constantly being online for work had slowly slipped away. Dream felt happy to wake up in the morning, a feeling that had left him a long time ago. The ease Dream felt slipping into this new life of no youtube or minecraft scared him. Why was it so easy for him to walk away like this? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe because it all had become toxic for him. Toxic wasn’t the right word when Dream thought of his career though, it was more like discontentment. He always felt happy to create content. But without the rush of his audience, Dream had no choice but to reflect on what he had become. In the last year, he had stopped taking care of himself. Dream had lost himself in the pursuit for fame. He barely recognized who he was when he looked in the mirror. The reality crushed him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The internal conflict of self hatred and insecurity pushed Dream further into isolation. Too many emotions were rushing through his head, he felt like he was drowning in his thoughts. The added guilt he felt from pushing his friends away only added to his turmoil. Dream had become a mess. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The onslaught of concern from his friends blew his phone up. But he had no desire to stop it because then he would have to talk. His absence had already been so long that he knew that he couldn’t get away with it. The thought of having to face his friends embarrassed him. He wanted to explain what was going on to his friends as much as they wanted to hear from him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The sound of his phone ringing again broke him out of deep thoughts. It was George again, missed call number 33, voicemail number 16. Dream closed his eyes as tears started to well up. He missed George. Everything in Dream screamed to return his call, try to formulate some excuse for his behavior. He always knew how to make Dream feel better. George would know what to say. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Deciding to distract himself, Dream sat up to go to the kitchen. It was early for him. 8 AM on a sunny March morning. A light breeze rustled through the palm dresses  outside his kitchen window, the first hints of spring peaking through. The bright morning made Dream smile as he opened up the window to let the warmth in. The humidity wasn’t high today so Dream felt justified.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Moving onto his breakfast, Dream swiftly opened the cabinet door to look for coffee grinds. His eyes landing on the Starbucks christmas blend, Dream laughed to himself as he pulled it out. It was only a couple of months after Christmas. The small joke made Dream feel better for a moment. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After 10 minutes, the coffee was done brewing. The glorious smell of peppermint and coffee greeted Dream as he poured it in his mug. Ribbons of steam lifted off the surface of the coffee as Dream moved to the outside porch. It was a beautiful morning and Dream wanted to take advantage of it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Settling into a wicker chair, Dream placed the coffee mug next to him on the table. His eyes scanned the horizon, watching cars roll by on the streets below. The neighborhood was starting its day as people went to work and school. A small part of Dream wished he had somewhere to escape to as well. But the desire wasn’t that strong as he relished in observing the movements of his neighbors during the morning. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His pocket of peace was interrupted by his phone vibrating. Internally kicking himself, Dream wondered why he brought it outside with him. Bringing his phone up to his face, he saw that George had texted him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I saw your tweet. When you are ready, please tell me what is going on. Everyone is so worried about you. I miss talking to you. I hope you are doing well Dream. Remember that I will always be there for you, no matter what. Please answer my calls when you are ready.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Guilt settled in the bottom of Dream’s stomach as he finished reading the message. Choosing to ignore it, Dream turned his phone off and placed it on the bedside table. He would deal with it later.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
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<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>thank you so much for the spending the time to read this far. you have no idea how much your time means to me.</p><p>if you have enjoyed this chapter, please feel free to leave a comment down below.</p><p>to the author tbhyourelame, i cannot thank you enough for the inspiration you have given me. your works heat waves has inspired my passion for writing again. for the longest time, i was struggling to find the motivation to write. but now i seem to have found it again thanks to you. you have such a gift with words.</p><p>i hope you all have a great day or night or whatever it is while you are reading this.</p><p>much love</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. right in front of you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In the darkness of his office, the computer screen gleamed at him like a spotlight. His eyes burned as he stared at the discord message to him asking if was going to be going the stream. It was currently 3 AM and he was exhausted. But he knew that any attempt at sleep would consist of hours of anxious thoughts that would keep him up till he passed out from pure exhaustion. <em>Yes, I will.</em></p><p>Seconds later, the faint ringing of a discord call came from his headphones as they sat next to his keyboard. This will be a nice distraction for the next couple of hours he thought to himself as he moved to answer. He needed to stay distracted in order to silence the loud voice in his head demanding he entertain the thoughts that sent him spiraling.</p><p>“Hey, George could finally make it!” Karl laughed as he teased George, making him smile. Quackity and Sapnap joined in with their own quick jabs at George taking so long to answer the call as well. George chuckled quietly, he was too tired to think of a funny response.</p><p>Karl took George’s lack of response as cue to start the stream. Quickly, he greeted the thousands of people pouring in to watch. George began to tune Karl out as he began to introduce everyone and talk about his plans for the stream. All George knew was that he was supposed to be helping build a villager trading hall. It sounded simple enough to him, a good distraction.</p><p>After a few minutes of waiting for more people to come, Karl began to move his character to the area where he planned the trading hall to be built. Sapnap and Quackity followed behind his avatar, joking with each other as chat exploded with excitement over the stream. George had completely missed the memo to begin moving his character as he stared blankly at the stream thinking about Dream.</p><p>He wondered what Dream was doing right now. It would only be 10 PM in Florida. It wasn’t too late but he might be in bed by now. George had no idea though, only guesses. He hadn’t talked to Dream in almost a month now. For the past three weeks, George had messaged and called Dream almost every day with no kind of response. The lack of contact had made George’s anxiety grow worse and worse each day.</p><p>The anxiety of Dream’s disappearance consumed George. Anymore, it was the only thing he could think about. It was the loudest thought in his head, it drowned everything else out. Any attempt at a distraction would be ruined by the obsessive thoughts of Dream. His mind constantly filled with a compulsive desire to reach out to Dream or the fear of what went wrong. It had become so bad it was starting to make George physically ill. He was plagued with a consistent knot in his stomach as the anxiety over Dream grew deeper roots in his mind. The more he thought about it, the harder it became for George to survive. He barely slept. He barely ate. He barely could breathe at times. It was all becoming too much.</p><p>“George, are you still there?” Karl’s voice shook George out his trace. Refocusing his eyes, George attempted to pull himself together for the stream.</p><p>“Yeah, I am. Sorry I was just distracted.” He mumbled softly as he moved around to catch up to everyone. Quackity teased him more as Karl started to again on his plan for the stream. George started to zone out again until Karl stopped talking suddenly.</p><p>George turned to his other monitor that held Karl’s stream as he tried to figure out what happened. He watched as Karl stared at something on his stream becoming visibly upset. His face became serious as he turned to look the camera straight in the eye. “Guys, I need to say something about this before we do anything else. Someone just donated asking about any updates on Dream. First, I wanna say thank you for the donation. Next, this is not to call the person out but to use them as an example. Please do not send anymore donos about Dream.” Karl’s voice was firm and steady, remaining clear in words. “To be frank, I know as much as you guys because I haven’t talked to him in a while. I just ask this because I have nothing to say and it’s upsetting to talk about. I want my stream to be a place to escape too.”</p><p>The mention of Dream caused George’s stomach to drop. His mind started to whirl as he realized that he wasn’t the only who hadn’t talked to Dream in a long time. George had never mentioned Dream’s disappearance to any of their mutual friends because he feared what he might find out. He didn’t want to gossip about Dream and make everything worse.</p><p>“Does anyone have anything else to add before I continue with the project?” Karl asked softly. George immediately became focused again as Quackity began to talk.</p><p>“No, I haven’t talked to him either. The last I heard from him was his tweet.” Quackity’s usual goofy demeanor was gone as he answered Karl’s question. George felt a mixture of relief and concern that there was another person who hadn’t been in contact with him. The anticipation of what Sapnap would say caught George’s full attention. If anyone had been able to reach Dream, he thought, it would have been Sapnap.</p><p>“Yeah, he hasn’t responded to me either.” George swore he felt his heart stop beating. He couldn’t believe it. Dream had completely stopped talking to everyone.</p><p>Silence fell over the group as everyone waited for George to say something. It became apparent that no one knew what was going on with Dream. George felt the words become lodged in his throat. He was utterly shocked. Clearing his throat he mumbled, “I haven’t talked to him in almost a month.”</p><p>“He hasn’t talked to you, George?” Sapnap blurted out, the words tumbling out before he could stop himself. George began to feel uncomfortable with the sudden shift of attention on him. He remained quiet as Sapnap attempted to fix his mistake. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put you on the spot. Just a little shocked is all.” He sounded upset as he offered his apology. George murmured a quick “mhm”, desperate to change the subject.</p><p>Nobody said anything for a few more seconds, each waiting to see who would make the first move. George mentally kicked himself as he realized what a jerk he had been to Sapnap. All he had done was ask a question. It would have probably been better to ask the question off stream or over a private message but it wasn’t the end of the world. The fans were definitely going to start asking more questions though. Between the blatant admission that no one had talked to Dream in a while and the now awkward tension between Sapnap and George, it appeared as if something bad had happened. George mentally kicked himself again, why did he have to be such a jerk?</p><p>Karl decided to take the first move, clearing his throat to refocus everyone’s attention. The chat was exploding with concern over what had just happened. “Um, now to get back to what we were originally doing, building a villager trading hall!”, he laughed out awkwardly trying to smooth over the tension. Quackity’s loud laugh burst through the stream, helping to lighten the mood as well. George felt himself relax as things began to return to normal.</p><p>----</p><p>Three hours later, the villager hall was built and the stream had come to an end. The first hints of morning peaked underneath the curtain on George’s windows. He looked over at the clock on his desk, it was 6:47 AM. Time had flown by while doing the stream. After the awkward beginning, George ended up having a great time. He felt sad when Karl announced he had to go. He didn’t want it to end because then he would have to come back to reality.</p><p>The message notification sound came from his computer interrupting his inner dialogue. George tensed up as he thought about who it might be. A small part of him was praying to God it was Dream. He had more questions than ever after learning that Dream had stopped contacting all his friends.</p><p>Quickly, George opened Discord and saw that Sapnap had messaged him. A feeling of dread overcame him as he moved to open the message. He was nervous as he began to read what it said. Throughout the whole stream, George felt weird whenever he interacted with Sapnap. Pangs of guilt hit him each time they talked. It was an incredibly uncomfortable feeling for him.</p><p>
  <em>I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have put you on the spot like that. I was just shocked and it slipped out. I hope I didn’t offend you. Hope things are well.</em>
</p><p>George hit the call button. The ringing of the Discord call filled his ears as he hoped for Sapnap to pick up.</p><p>“Uh, hey.” Sapnap’s voice was awkward as he answered the call. George felt the tension from earlier return with the absence of their friends not there to ease it.</p><p>“Hey. I’m sorry too. I was caught off guard as well. I shouldn’t have been so short with you. Sapnap, you didn’t offend me.” George explained, feeling better about everything. It was quiet after he apologized.</p><p>Suddenly, Sapnap cleared his throat and let out a light laugh. “Thank god. I was so worried you were mad at me. I thought I had just lost another best friend.” George smiled as he reassured Sapnap that he wasn’t mad, he just didn’t know what to say at the time.</p><p>They continued to talk for a few more minutes, falling back into the normal rhythm of their friendship. For a minute, Sapnap became silent as he gathered his thoughts. George leaned back in his chair as he waited for what was about to come. When Sapnap became quiet, it normally meant he had something on his mind that he didn’t know how to bring up. But George could probably guess what it was.</p><p>“So, Dream hasn’t talked to you?”</p><p>“Nope. I’ve sent him messages on everything. I’ve called him almost every other day. I get nothing. I’m worried, Sapnap.” George left out an exasperated sigh, letting his frustration become evident. As worried as George was, he was also becoming irritated by the whole thing.</p><p>“He’s been doing the exact same thing to me. No matter how much I try to contact him, it’s just complete silence.” Sapnap agreed with George. He found comfort in knowing that he wasn’t the only one going through this.</p><p>“I don’t understand what happened. He seemed fine the last time I talked to him. It was after one of Tommy’s streams and we had been texting after. Dream said good night and he hasn’t sent anything since.” George tried to search in his head to see if there was anything off about that night. Did Dream act differently? Did he say something that should have been a warning sign for George? But nothing seemed off, it was just like normal.</p><p>“I think the last time for me was the day before that stream. We had called for a bit and Dream seemed really upset about something he saw on twitter. Like there was this account that was really going after him about things and I guess a lot of people were agreeing with it. But I couldn’t imagine him dropping everything because of that.” George inhaled a sharp breath, he began to remember how upset Dream was about it.</p><p>“That might be it. But I don’t know…” He trailed off, his mind working through Dream’s reaction to the thing on twitter. Dream wouldn’t stop talking about it at the time. At one point, he sounded on the verge of tears as he read off to George some of the things people were saying. George didn’t know how to react so he just made a few light-hearted jokes to lighten Dream’s mood. It didn’t seem like that big of a deal at the time because normally Dream just laughed those types of things off.</p><p>“Yeah, it’s all really odd. I talked to his mom about two weeks ago. I called her after Dream hadn’t responded to anything for a week and she said he was doing fine and that he just needed a break.” Sapnap’s voice got quiet as he finished his thought. George wondered what he was thinking.</p><p>“It still worries me though. I just want to talk to him.” Sapnap agreed quietly before he said something that sent chills through George’s body.</p><p>“Me too. It’s almost like you have to go to his fucking front door so he can’t ignore you.” He giggled softly, not realizing the implications of his words. George wanted to reach through the screen and shake Sapnap. He was completely right. You can’t ignore someone if they are right in front of you.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hello!</p><p>thank you so much for all the love on the first chapter. i couldn't stop smiling at all the comments. i am so grateful for all of you.</p><p>i'm sorry for the slow update. i have finals for college right now and things have been a bit crazy. but this is my last week of the semester so i will have plenty of time to write :) i have some other ideas for dnf so look out for those in the coming weeks! i will try and update this book once a week for the next month or so.</p><p>if you enjoyed the chapter, feel free to leave a comment down below! also if you have any suggestions, please comment that as well.</p><p>thank you so much,</p><p>laguna</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. i owe it to him</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>London to Miami. London to Tampa. London to Orlando. So many different ways to get to the same location, it was overwhelming. The 15% off a roundtrip flight to Fiji banner flashed across the screen in front of him. All he could do was stare at the screen as he thought about what the fuck he was doing right now. Was he actually considering flying to Florida to see Dream? Was he that desperate to talk to him that he was going to show up, unannounced, at Dream’s front door? Scoffing at himself, George pulled out his phone to send a picture to Sapnap. He would think it was funny.</p><p><em>Oh my god. I am calling you when my class is done</em>. Sapnap had texted him within seconds of George snapping him that picture. He chuckled to himself as he realized that Sapnap wasn’t paying attention to his class at all. Standing up, George headed towards the kitchen as he waited for Sapnap’s call. Without the flight tickets in front of him, he was able to properly think about what he was actually planning on doing.</p><p>After Sapnap had made that joke, George couldn’t stop thinking about it. What if he actually went to Florida and went to Dream’s house? Dream couldn’t ignore him then could he. But at the same time, it was a huge invasion of privacy and ultimately none of George’s business. It had been an internal struggle all week filled with the disbelief that he was actually considering it and a desire to buy a plane ticket as soon as possible. He hadn’t told anyone what he was thinking because he was still trying to process it as well.</p><p>Over the last month and a half, George had struggled deeply with the absence of Dream. He began to realize how much he depended on their friendship. Dream made George happy. Between working together on content or late night phone calls with just the two of them, Dream had become a huge part of his routine. The loss of Dream’s daily presence created a hole in George’s life that cut him wide open. Every day, he caught himself waiting for a call or message that would never come. He tortured himself with old messages as he scoured for hours looking for what went wrong. Thousands of tweets, comments and messages poured in on the daily only reminding him further of Dream’s disappearance.</p><p>He had tried to be understanding of the whole situation. Things can come up in life that shake people to their core. They act different and might not be able to comprehend what they’re going through. George desperately tried to remind himself of that. He didn’t want to pressure Dream into doing something that he wasn’t comfortable with. But as time passed, it became harder and harder to accept what was going on. The breaking point was when George had to hear from Dream through Twitter. The tweet was a stab in the gut, deepening the wound that he had created.</p><p>It was a pain he had never experienced before. To know that Dream would send out a superficial tweet then tell him personally what was going on hurt more than words could describe. They used to tell each other everything it felt like. Dream and George relied on each other, they were there for each other. Why was this time any different? What could have possibly gone so wrong that Dream was willing to drop their whole friendship?</p><p>George clenched his fists as he felt his hurt turn to anger. George had done nothing wrong. For the last month, he sent message after message to only receive nothing. He had tried everything to show Dream that he was there for him. That after all that had occurred, he would be more than willing to listen and support Dream in whatever had happened. But now it felt like he was being put aside instead of Dream simply needing a few days to sort things out. Instead of being honest about what was going on between them, Dream was ignoring him. His lack of respect towards George’s feelings only distressed him more. Why could he walk away from George so easily? It was like he didn’t care about him at all.</p><p>In a moment of boldness produced by his frustrations, George pulled out his phone. His fingers smacked the keyboard in haste as he typed out a message to Dream. <em>For the last month, I have tried to be there for you. I have tried to be understanding of the fact that things are going in your life that you don’t feel comfortable sharing. But I’m sick and tired of playing this game. If I did something wrong, I’m begging you to please just tell me. I can’t keep doing this, Dream. I just thought you would have cared enough to at message me that you were doing okay.</em> Without looking over the message, he hit send before he could regret anything.</p><p>The sound of his phone ringing pulled George out his angry thoughts. Pressing the answer button roughly, he grunted out a short greeting to whoever had called him. He was not in the mood to talk to anyone right now.</p><p>“Woah, what’s with the attitude?” Sapnap’s voice sounded surprised as he greeted George back. The question helped George calm down. Sapnap didn’t do anything wrong, he didn’t need to take his frustrations out on him again.</p><p>“Sorry, I’m just a little worked up right now.” His voice softened at the end to signal a non-verbal apology. Sapnap shuffled around on the other end, leaving an awkward silence hanging between them.</p><p>“It’s ok. Why are you looking at plane tickets?” Just like that, they fell back into their normal rhythm. George felt himself laugh, releasing the tension that had built up in his anger.</p><p>“I just couldn’t stop thinking about what you said last week.” George had tried to resist looking at plane tickets but here he was.</p><p>“Dude, it was a joke” Sapnap giggled as he got into his car, the loud slam of his door sounding throughout the call, “Are you actually considering it?”</p><p>“Yeah, I think so.” Sapnap didn’t respond for a minute. George couldn’t believe he had just admitted that out loud. He finally realized how crazy he actually sounded.</p><p>“Why?” It was faint and quiet, allowing George to gather his thoughts.</p><p>“I don’t know. I just… I owe it to Dream.” He could hear Sapnap scoff in response.</p><p>“No. You don’t owe anything to him.” Now it was George’s turn to ask about attitude. His voice was sharp, frustration hinted behind every word.</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“He’s completely shut us out, George. Why do you feel the need to do anything for him?” Sapnap spat out the words at George. His tone had completely shifted. It caught George off guard as he realized how mad that Sapnap was.</p><p>“Because he’s our frie-”</p><p>“No. He’s not to me. I can’t be friends with Dream after all this.” Sapnap grumbled as he cut off George. An immense feeling of guilt began to pound at George as he reflected on Sapnap’s words. Listening to the harsh tones laced with the heartbreak of losing a friend, it sounded exactly like what he was thinking earlier. George knew that he had been too hard on Dream as he heard his inner thoughts echoed into the void of their phone call. To truly listen to what Sapnap had said reaffirmed to him that he needed to go to Florida.</p><p>“I felt that way too. But thinking about it now, Dream needs us. There is something wrong. This is so out of character for him, it's just too big to ignore.” His voice was strong as he gently fought back against Sapnap’s lack of support. George held his breath as he waited for Sapnap’s response, anxious tapping his foot on the floor in anticipation.</p><p>“Okay. Do what you want, George. I gotta go now. Bye.” And just like that, Sapnap ended the call. The abrupt ending left him paralyzed for a moment. He was shocked with the way Sapnap had just acted. His hands started to shake as he thought about the fact that he might have just lost another friend.</p><p>Placing his phone on the kitchen table, George began to pace the hallway in his apartment. His mind whirling, Sapnap’s words playing on repeat in his head, hopelessly trying to justify what just happened. He was hurt and he’s just taking it out on me, George thought to himself. George was right there, Sapnap was upset, they were talking about something that both hurt them, it was a bad combination. The rationalization calmed George as he finally stopped pacing and stood still.</p><p>Out of habitat, George’s focus fell on his phone to check his messages. After typing in his passcode to open the phone, his heart dropped as the screen switched from the lockscreen to the messages between Dream and him. Underneath the text message George had sent in the last half hour, the word ‘<strong>Read 6:29 PM</strong>’ jumped out in front of him. Dream had read his message. This was the first time George had gotten back any form of a response. George hugged his phone to his chest as he smiled happily to himself. Dream had actually read his message, he was alive at least.</p><p>Suddenly, George knew what he had to do. Like he was being chased for dear life, George raced towards his computer. In a swift motion, he plopped into the seat and stretched out his arms in excitement. A huge smile broke across his face as he stared at the screen.</p><p>“I’m coming, Dream.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hello!! </p><p>thank you so much for all the love on the last two chapters!! I am so blessed. your time and attention mean the world to me and I am forever grateful. I cannot wait for the future of this story. </p><p>I know this was a bit short but the next chapter should make up for it!</p><p>if you enjoyed the story, please feel free to leave a comment. if you have any suggestions, please feel free to comment that as well :)</p><p>thank you again,</p><p>laguna</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. broken promises</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rain splashed harshly onto the window, fat blobs of water rolling down the glass upon impact. A calming wind ruffled the palm trees, shaking them to life under the dark skies. The sounds comforted Dream as he sat on his couch watching the storm roll by. Inside his house, it was quiet and bright, the polar opposite to the outside. Warm light basked the living room in hues of gold that left a homely feeling over everything it touched. Dream’s TV, phone and computer were all turned off in an effort to not disrupt the peaceful atmosphere. Pulling the blanket he had over him closer to his chin, Dream sighed contently. This was the most calm he had felt in days.</p><p>The opposition in atmospheres between the outside and inside stood as a parallel to his head and his life. On the outside, Dream had become quiet and distant, concealing himself away so all that was left was a lifeless shell of who he was. Inside his head, a storm had been raging on for weeks on end. The peace he had first felt after quitting social media had dissipated rather quickly, leaving him lost again. The feeling of days seeming to drag on returned but in a different form. Before he felt like he did the same thing each day, but now he realized that it was always different. Between streaming with different people, working on ideas for videos and the SMP and meeting with his team, Dream had just gotten caught up in the mundane. He stopped enjoying the little things. He became so focused on the destination that he stopped looking around on the journey there. Now, the day consisted of him waking up around noon, watching TV and doing some chores around the house until it became 2 AM and the process started all over again. Dream wanted nothing more than to return to his old life.</p><p>But he didn’t completely want to go back to how things were. A few days ago, Dream decided that something needed to change. He had been moping around the house for weeks on end now, not knowing what to do. Dream had genuinely done nothing meaningful with his time off. So after over a month of not playing, he decided to boot up Minecraft and see what would happen. The bright red Mojang screen beamed at him like an old friend, welcoming him back. Dream smiled, anticipation filling him as he waited for the home screen to appear. The smooth glide of the camera across the different Nether biomes comforted him as he clicked to open up a New World.</p><p>A minute passed before the game opened up to his character in the middle of a desert. With nothing in sight, it was a bleak and lonely welcome back to the game. Dream didn’t move his character for a while as he sat in pure astonishment. He couldn’t believe how much this game had given him. From a single cube came millions of people supporting him, a community that loved him and a way to make a change in the world. A mixture of appreciation and love blossomed as different memories of playing Minecraft passed through his mind. He didn’t realize how much he missed it.</p><p>For the next hour, Dream played Minecraft how he used to play it: by himself. The slow beginning with the grind towards diamond armour and tools was a refreshing take on the game. Without hundreds of eyes on him, he was able to enjoy the simple beginning. It was satisfying as he laid down the final touches to his starter base and stepped back to take it all in. The feeling he used to get when he was younger playing minecraft hit him, another old friend returning from the past. He welcomed it with open arms, latching onto the feeling like he never wanted to let it go. The simple enjoyment of Minecraft that had so long ago escaped him as he started to make it his career had finally come back. This was why he had started making youtube videos in the first place, to share this feeling with others. Dream felt himself tear up, he had finally found some clarity in the mess he had created over the last couple of weeks.</p><p>How did he return this feeling back to his work? This question plagued for the next couple of days as he slowly got back into playing the game. Dream missed making content but he knew that he couldn’t go back to the way things were. Something needed to change in the way he did things but any idea of what slipped his mind. He couldn’t place his finger on it for the life of him. He mulled over different changes in his head but nothing seemed like they would work.</p><p>The replay in his of the last couple of days was interrupted by a loud clap of thunder unleashed by the storm. It startled Dream, causing him to whip his head around to gather his surroundings. Realizing that it was only the storm, he felt himself relax again. His eyes scanned around the room, looking at all the things he had accumulated in his short 21 years. His phone winked at him as the white light hit its black screen, beckoning his attention. Attempting to ignore it, Dream leaned back into the chair and closed his eyes in order to enjoy the quiet moment.</p><p>As the stillness of his house overtook him again, his mind slipped to his friends. He missed them greatly. The guilt of abandoning all his friendships ate at him daily, creating massive holes in his heart. Memories of him and his friends replayed constantly in his mind, his way of torturing himself over what he did. To say he felt horrible was an understatement, this was one of the worse things he’s ever done to anyone. His friends had done so much for him and this was how he chose to repay them. The success of his career was in great part due to his interactions with his friends and their willingness to help him in any way they could. Dream would do anything to go back and change what he did.</p><p>His willingness to apologize was trumped by how to actually give the apology. Just like with returning back to work, Dream had no idea how to properly approach his friends. He knew that he couldn’t just pop back up again with no explanation. Confusion, anger and hurt were some of things Dream expected from his friends. They would demand answers to questions he was still searching to figure out. Some of them might not accept his apology and what he did. Dream couldn’t even begin to imagine anymore of it because it scared him. It was easier to ignore it all and continue going on with the way things were. If he didn’t acknowledge it, then it didn’t exist in a way.</p><p>In a turn for the worse, his mind travelled down the path of guilt towards George. Casting his eyes away from George’s face on the side of the trail, Dream attempted to rush past to continue on his internal journey. But the strong connection to George gripped him by his shoulder, pulling him back so he couldn’t ignore it.</p><p>Blue eyes met brown eyes as he turned around to face George. “Dream, I hope you are well. I miss you so much. I think of you all the time, it’s honestly becoming quite hard to work.” The recording of one of the voicemails George had left came out of his mouth as he looked at Dream, a broken laugh causing a pause between his words. “I know you are probably tired of me calling you but I just can’t help it. Whenever you are ready, please call me. I can’t wait to hear from you again.” His words were a double edged sword as they tormented Dream. Flying at him from each direction, the stabs cut deep within him.</p><p>More words spilled out of George’s mouth, another voicemail, as Dream froze in horror. He wanted to run as far away as possible to escape the torture his mind was inflicting on him. George's words surrounded Dream, suffocating him with the weight they held. But his feet stayed planted to the ground because he knew that he deserved all of this. He deserved to hear the pain in George’s voice. The desperation and ache that grew in each voicemail the longer Dream ignored him. Doubling over in pain, Dream began to understand the implications of his actions, the consequences hitting him with full force.</p><p>Suddenly, the absence of the soft dull from the air conditioner awoke Dream from his nightmare. Opening his eyes, Dream noticed the AC unit had been knocked out by the storm raging on outside. His internal reflection was cut short as he decided that he needed to get up to contact someone as soon as possible. Grabbing his phone on the coffee table, he turned it on slowly. The bright apple logo shined at him miserably in the dark of the room. His phone was just another reminder of what a shit friend he was.</p><p>After a few seconds, the phone booted up. The lock screen picture of George, Sapnap and him stared mockingly at him, another reminder. Dream shook his head, he really needed to change that. Unlocking his phone, he saw that he had three new messages: one from his mother, one from a hometown friend and one from George. His heart ached when he saw the bolded <strong>Georgie</strong> with the nerd emoji next to his name. He wanted to ignore the message but his curiosity got the better of him.</p><p>The grey bubble appeared before him as he clicked on their conversation. His eyes scanned the message slowly, holding his breath in anticipation. <em>For the last month, I have tried to be there for you. I have tried to be understanding of the fact that things are going in your life that you don’t feel comfortable sharing. But I’m sick and tired of playing this game. If I did something wrong, I’m begging you to please just tell me. I can’t keep doing this, Dream. I just thought you would have cared enough to at least message me that you were doing okay.</em></p><p>He gasped lightly, his breath shaky as he read over the message again. George thought he had done something wrong, he was blaming himself. Tears began to well up in his eyes, quickly threatening to spill over. His lip trembled as he continued rereading the message in disbelief. How could George ever think any of this was his fault?</p><p>One of his worst fears was coming alive right before his eyes, losing George. It never occurred to him that George would grow tired of waiting for him. George’s constant attempts at contacting him had always made Dream feel safe in the fact that George cared enough to not walk away like he did. Yet he had been so caught up in his own mind that he didn’t stop until recently to think how George might have been taking all this. Him and George had promised they would always be there for each other, no matter what happened. But Dream had broken that promise first by shutting George out of his life. It wasn't fair now to expect George to respect their promise when he couldn't do the same. Dream could feel the small crack he had created in their friendship growing bigger with each day as it edged closer to shattering everything.</p><p>Throwing his phone down in frustration, Dream let out an exasperated sigh. Angry tears rolled down his cheeks as buried his head in his hands. He felt ashamed of himself. How had he let it get this bad? The problem had turned into more than just him taking a break from his work, it had become complete isolation. Pushing his friends, fans and career away felt right at the time. Now, he was on the brink of truly losing everything. He violently beat himself on the head, broken sobs escaping his mouth.</p><p>The overwhelming thoughts flooded his brain, an all too familiar feeling. Failure crept up on him, offering a comforting arm around his shoulder as he continued to cry. He had failed at being a friend. He had failed at being a good creator. He had failed at getting better. And now here he was, lost and alone because of his own doing.</p><p>He cried for several more minutes, letting himself feel his pain. It had become so large he could no longer ignore it. The release of bottled up emotion made him feel better as he began to calm down. Grabbing his phone again, he diverted his attention to the other messages left on his phone. A text from his friend Warren asking him how he was caught his eye. Dream hadn’t talked in Warren in several months since he had been so busy with work.</p><p>Before he could stop himself, Dream called Warren. I desperately need human interaction, he thought as the sound of the call ringing filled his ears. Anticipation got to him again as he anxiously waited for Warren to answer the call.</p><p>“Clay! Is that you calling me?” Warren greeted Dream warmly, his voice a comfortable memory. It had been so long since Dream had talked to him, he didn’t realize how much he had missed him until he heard Warren’s voice.</p><p>“Yeah, hey. I just got your message. How are you?” Clay sniffled quietly, trying to clear his voice of any trace of crying. Silence fell over them for a minute as Warren shuffled around in the background of the call.</p><p>“I’m doing good. I missed talking to you buddy. I understand you’ve been so busy with work though. It happens to the best of us.” The comment hit Dream in the gut. These problems had long been accumulating in his life before he had even begun to notice. Not talking to one of his oldest friends for months should have been the first sign to him that his work was starting to change him. Dream shook his head, he felt like a dick.</p><p>“I’m so sorry man. I feel so horrible. I’m finally starting to realize how toxic I was being with my work. I was, like, letting it consume me to the point where I was neglecting myself and my relationships. It’s gotten really bad in the last couple of months.” His admission fell off his tongue, crashing to the ground of reality. He had finally admitted it to someone. Warren offered a noise of understanding before talking back.</p><p>“I saw your tweet, it made me worry about you. You’ve probably been working so hard that you got addicted to it. It’s okay to take a step back from everything though. Your mental health is more important.” Warren's voice was soft as he extended his own thoughts on everything. Dream didn’t say anything in response because he didn’t know what to say. Warren validating his feelings was a breath of fresh air. He didn’t feel so crazy anymore because someone else saw it too. “If you ever need to talk, Clay, I’m always a phone call away. I gotta go into the store now but don’t be afraid to reach out.”</p><p>“Thank you, Warren. Talk to you soon.”</p><p>“Anytime. Goodbye.” The beep signaling the end of the call left Dream feeling alone again but having talked to Warren made the feeling a bit more bearable.</p><p>He didn’t move for a while after the call. His mind running wild with his thoughts over Warren. He had been so kind after Dream had made no attempt to contact him in months. Warren was understanding, even offering him support. It made Dream wonder if his other friends would react this way if he reached out to him. But the uncertainty made his stomach twist into knots, he was too afraid to find out. But he wasn't afraid enough to at least tip his toe into the murky waters of what lay ahead for his friendships. For the first time in almost two months, Dream decided to give some kind of signal to his friends. Clicking back to his and George's conversations, he turned on read receipts to show that he had read George's message. This was a start.</p><p>Gathering himself, Dream stood up slowly to start walking. His footsteps echoed in the hallway as he moved towards the bathroom to shower. The silence reminded him of how alone he truly felt. </p><p>Quickly, he started the shower, maxing it out to its hottest setting. Stripping himself of his clothes, he started towards the shower. Billows of steam escaped from all sides of the curtain, inviting Dream into its cozy waters of warmth. The first step underneath the fall of the water soothed his tense muscles with a comfortable splash. He stood still for a moment, absorbing the heat into his skin.</p><p>Returning to present reality, he poured shampoo into his hands and gently lathered it throughout his hair. He sighed deeply, allowing himself to loosen the tight grip he had on his mind all day. The constant desire to be in control slipped away from him for the time being as he forced his mind to remain in the current moment.</p><p>The tranquility of the shower did not last long though as Dream reached down to wash his body. His soap was a combination three-in-one, it was something that George had. Dream teased him mercilessly when he found out that George used that.</p><p>“You’re so disgusting! How can you use that?” Dream remembers saying between wheezes of laughter on a late night phone call. He could hear the noise that George made in protest that night, embarrassed by his three-in-one. In mock anger, George had ignored him.</p><p>“Come on, you know I’m only kidding.” At the time, Dream didn’t know that George was pretending. He just knew that at the moment, he suddenly felt horrible. It was never his intention to hurt George. “Seriously, George. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. You know I would never do anything to ever hurt you.” His voice had become desperate the longer George dragged out the silence between them.</p><p>Suddenly, bright laughter had escaped George’s mouth as he had gotten the reaction he wanted out of Dream, “I’m not mad, I was just pretending.” Dream remembered chuckling at George's laughter and a huge grin that had spread across his face. His heart fluttered at the memory, he missed those kind of calls. </p><p>“Okay, I’m glad. I never want to hurt you.” His voice had grown quiet at the end, the serious tone had killed George’s laughter.</p><p>“I know you won’t… we’re always going to be there for each other, right?” George’s voice resonated inside Dream’s mind as he continued to replay their conversation.</p><p>“I promise.”</p><p>“I promise too.”</p><p>The three words popped out in grave reminder. Dream felt a singular tear roll down his cheeks as he thought back on it.</p><p>He had broken their promise.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hello! A few things I need to mention so please read. Warren is an original character. Dream has never stated that he has ever had a friend named this. If he did then, wow I'm good at guessing. Second, I'm looking for some established writers in the DNF community that is willing to read my work and offer comments and suggestions before it's published. You would be credited and I would link your account. I would prefer that these people be at least 16. If anyone is interested, please contact me at my new twitter: lagunaindigo ! I have just made this account so it's pretty empty so far. Drop your twitter handles in the comments so I can follow you all!</p><p>That is all for now! Thank you all so much :) I appreciate you more than you will ever know. Your support means the world. </p><p>Thanks a million, </p><p>Laguna</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. florida</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Palm leaves passed by in a blur, blending into shades of greens and yellows. A cold breeze blew at George’s feet while he sat in the back of a car, causing goosebumps to prick at his skin. He shivered, running his hands along his arms in an attempt to warm himself. The uber driver hummed along quietly to the song on the radio, it sounded like jazz, something he didn’t recognize. But the music was calming, slowing his rapidly beating heart as the car inched closer to its destination. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>George sighed deeply to himself, staring at the window as the world flew by him. They were moving so fast, it was overwhelming. He wanted to take the wheel from the driver and slow them to an idle crawl so he could have more time to collect himself. His mind was in overdrive, thoughts flying around his head at full speed. With trembling hands, George tried desperately to grab onto one, something that he could hold onto. A single thought to anchor himself so he didn’t spiral. But to no avail, they slipped through his fingers leaving him helpless and alone. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I heard an accent when you came into the car. What brings you down here?” The driver’s voice was kind, cutting into the calming atmosphere. George turned to face him, their eyes meeting in the rear view mirror. They exchanged a knowing look, passing unspoken words between them. He could feel George’s anxiety, his fear of what laid ahead. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m seeing a friend.” His words came out cold, creating a divide between himself and the driver. It was a silent cue to leave him alone. George didn’t care to explain why he had flown across an ocean to see someone who had essentially abandoned him. It was something that he had a hard time understanding, it muddled his brain with doubts and confusion. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The man seemed to miss the cue as he said, “Ah, that’s nice. I’m sure they will be glad to see you.”. George quietly laughed to himself, if only he knew the half of it. Dream had no idea that he was coming. The thought sent a sobering chill down George’s back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What’s so funny?” The driver asked playfully, his voice teasing. He smiled at George in the rearview mirror, his eyes crinkled with years of age. The wall started to crack, small pieces tumbling over the edge as George couldn’t help but smile back. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s a long story -”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We still have 20 more minutes until we get to the hotel.” Throwing his hands up to gesture at the GPS on the dashboard, proving his point. George took a deep breath, questioning if he really wanted to open up about this with a random stranger. The driver looked at him expectantly, awaiting the long story. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My friend doesn’t know I’m coming.” George pieced together the words carefully, afraid he was going to get it wrong. “I haven’t talked to him in a couple of months and I’m worried about him. So I decided to come check up on him.” He felt himself tense as he anticipated the driver’s reaction, afraid of his judgement.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You are a good friend.” His whole body went slack as he replayed what the driver had said. That was it? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t know about that.” George was lost on what to say. The words lodged in his throat because what was there really to say? He had flown hundreds of miles to <em> potentially </em> see Dream. His mental health had become so poor in the last couple of months that he felt like he was constantly at the brink of falling over the edge. He had become so desperate to escape the tight robe he walked on that he impulsively bought a plane ticket as his last ditch effort to save himself. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No friend of mine has ever traveled across the ocean to check up on me.” The driver’s words offered some comfort to George as he laughed in response to the comment. His jumbled thoughts slowly faded as the old man continued, “Don’t sell yourself short.” George just nodded, pretending to understand what he meant.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The rest of the car ride went by in silence. George turned back to face the window to watch the horizon as the driver turned the volume of the radio up to drown out the noise of the car. Hues of greens and yellows returned to their position, resuming the show for George as they moved ahead. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It felt surreal when George saw the Orlando sign, welcoming him into the city. His breath caught in throat as he skimmed over the white letters against the deep blue background. He was here, in Florida. When the driver pulled up to the front of the hotel and came to a stop, the reality hit George even harder. He couldn’t move, overwhelmed with Dream being somewhere in the city, so close to him. The thought made his heart race, his anxiety only making it beat faster.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well we’re here. It was lovely to meet you.” It was bittersweet having to say goodbye. George was going to miss the driver, even though he only knew for a brief moment in time. “I hope all goes well with your friend.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you for the ride. It was a pleasure meeting you as well.” He said as he released his seatbelt and grabbed his backpack. The heat of the Florida air thick with humidity consumed him as he stepped out of the car, his goosebumps disappearing within seconds. George suddenly longed to be back in the chilly car, the warmth of the air already creating sweat on his back. The driver smiled knowingly at George as he moved to grab the suitcase out of the trunk, taking in his reaction to Florida. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s a universal feeling for everyone who visits here. There is just something about when you take your first step outside, it’s like a different world.” The driver commented, handing over the luggage. George nodded, taking in a gulp of stale air before thanking the driver again. They talked for a minute before the driver bid his final goodbye and left. George felt the talons of loneliness latch onto him as he started inside to get his room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> All okay?  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His phone beeped, alerting George that someone had texted him. It was Sapnap. Sitting up, George responded back to him almost immediately. <em> Yup. Just got into my room.  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>After Sapnap had abruptly hung up after their conversation about George coming to visit Dream, their relationship had been rocky. George was frustrated with his friend, not understanding why he was giving up Dream so easily. Sapnap was on the opposite side, lost on why George would do so much for someone who couldn’t even bother to text back. Their differing views had led to tense conversations that skated around the outskirts of anger and misunderstanding. Neither party dared to cross the invisible boundary that had grown between them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It had been three weeks since then and things had only slightly approved. Sapnap had reluctantly helped George plan his visit which seemed to improve their conversations. He began to sense why this trip was so important, he started to fully see the impacts of Dream’s absence on George. His friend had become an anxious mess, hyper fixating on anything that involved Dream. The obsession seemed to consume George and it seeped into every faucet of his life. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Friendships started to fade as they grew tired of George only speaking of Dream. They had given up a long time ago, why couldn’t he? His streams started to become less frequent as he started to lack the motivation. When he did upload content, fans complained that it wasn’t fun anymore, it seemed forced. They struggled to get through the videos just as much as George struggled to make them. He could barely eat or sleep, causing his physical health to deteriorate. George wasn’t the same anymore and it scared Sapnap. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> When are you going to see him?  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>George shrugged, he had no idea. The thought of seeing Dream shook George to his core. He was not prepared. No words in the world seemed to convey what he wanted to say. There was so much that it seemed impossible. <em> I don’t know yet. When do you think I should? </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Tomorrow, take the rest of the day to recover.  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tossing his phone behind him, George stood up to look out the window. Tall buildings surrounded him with roads full of cars and people scattered below. One of them down there could be Dream, George thought as he placed his hand on the cold glass. The cool sensation underneath his fingertips stabilized him, reaffirming that this was all real. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>His mind slipped back to seeing Dream. What would he say if he saw him? George was angry with Dream, for abandoning him and their friendship. He wanted to scream at him for all that he had done, for the pain he had put him through for months. George wanted to make him understand the sleepless nights he spent frantically trying to understand why Dream had disappeared. Dream had shut the door that connected them and George had spent months trying to find the key, begging from the other side for him to open up. But George was also scared for Dream. He wanted to hold him close and have him explain. So he could try to fathom what was so bad that Dream felt that he needed to take such extreme measures to protect himself. George wanted to understand so he could help his friend. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The conflicting emotions pounded against his skull, the inklings of a headache were fast approaching him. George removed his hand from the window, his grasp on reality quickly receding away. Months of pent emotion fought against him as he attempted to calm himself. He needed to be stable for Dream. But right now, Dream wasn’t here and George was by himself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He collapsed onto the floor, pulling into himself. He could no longer handle suppressing how he felt, the barriers would need to come down. His body was racked with tears as he hugged his knees to his chest, allowing himself to feel his emotions. Hot flashes of anger and chilly nips of sadness passed through him as he cried to himself. In order to properly deal with Dream, George had to deal with himself first. He needed to face the demons he had kept at bay for so long. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>-- The Next Day --</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Dude, you are so lame.” Warren’s voice cracked through the headphone. Dream rolled his eyes, laughing mockingly as Warren continued to complain about losing for the third game in a row. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>This was the first time in months that Dream had felt genuinely happy. After he had called Warren, their friendship seemed to blossom. They had been almost inseparable the last few weeks, catching up on lost time. Warren served as a great distraction from the mess Dream continued to ignore.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s not my fault you suck at the game.” Dream teased back. Warren mumbled to himself as he started up another game, determined to not lose for a fourth time. “Hey, watch your mouth. I could stop playing with you and then you’d have nobody to play COD with you.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I can stop being your friend and then you’d have no one.” The words slipped out of Warren’s mouth with instant regret. Dream sucked in a sharp breath. Warren tripped over his words, sputtering out a weak apology as he realized the implications of his words. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it. I swear. Clay, I feel so bad.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Dream’s heart sank as Warren’s words played in his head. It was true. If Warren left, he would have no friends. He had burned all his other friendships to the ground and had made no attempt to fix any of them. They were beyond repair now. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s okay.” His voice was weak and tired. The guilt returning at full speed, wrapping its arms around his neck as it choked the life out of him. Every concerned message played in his head as he felt the black hole suck him in. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Clay, I am so sorry.” Warren sounded like he was on the verge of tears. He felt horrible. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m gonna go. I’ll talk to you later, okay?” Dream needed to get away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah. Okay. I’m sorry.” He turned off the game, throwing his headphones on the couch. Loneliness surrounded him as he walked towards his bedroom to lay down. He needed to recover. The reminder that he had no friends prodded at him gently throughout most days, yet he had learned to ignore it for the most part. But Warren had stabbed the knife through his heart, forcing him to remember all that he had lost. He had removed the distraction and now Dream was left staring at his mess, in crystal clear vision. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Upon arriving in his room, Dream crawled into his bed. The warmth of the sheets hugging his body as he relaxed into his mattress. Silent tears began to slip from his eyes as he sat with the guilt of lost friendships and having no idea how to find them. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>--- </p>
<p> </p>
<p>There are times in life when everything feels like it leads to a specific moment. Hyper aware of your surroundings, taking in each sensation as if it will be the last time you will ever experience it. George feels like that as he stands outside Dream’s door. He can feel the humidity, causing the sweat rolling slowly down his cheeks, escaping into his mouth with a salty flare. His clothing sticking to his damp skin from the thick air. The light breeze on his neck that ruffles the trees on the side of the house. The red door that glares at him in the bright light of the Florida sun. George is here. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>His hand reaches up to knock on the door but it pauses one inch away. Hesitations flood his mind, causing a delay in his action. George shakes his head, squashing his fears as he taps on the door. The world falls silent in anticipation. George’s breath catches as he awaits what happens next. It’s your move, Dream. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Inside the house, Dream awoke to the sound of loud knocking on his door. He sat up suddenly, looking around to catch his bearings. His phone next to him read that he had fallen asleep for almost an hour. It was currently 2 PM. Dream stood up slowly, confused on who could be at his door. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soft thuds escape from the house, feet climbing down stairs. The sounds become louder as someone approaches the door. George’s eyes watch as a shaded part of the window in the door grows dark with a person blocking the light. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Dream peeked through the window to see who it was. His heart began to race as he attempted to make out the figure in the blurry glass. They looked remarkably like George. He stepped back from the window, his breathing becoming shallow. Short and grasping, his breaths seemed to escape him. He was hallucinating, there is no way it could be him.</p>
<p>George knocked on the door again as the figure disappeared from sight. Fear sank to the pit of his stomach as he realized that Dream might not open the door. He didn’t know if he could  handle that devastation. It would be the ultimate betrayal of their friendship.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Suddenly, movement came from behind the door as someone approached it. As if it was holding its breath, the door knob creaked softly as the person began to open the door. George’s heart drops when the red door glides up. <em> Clay.  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>“George?” Dream was almost unrecognizable to the person that George had last seen. His hair had grown out. Dark circles hung underneath his eyes, giving him a gaunt look to his face. He had grown incredibly thin. It broke his heart to see his friend in such a condition. George stared at him, continuing to take in his appearance. “What… I can’t believe it’s you.” Dream mumbled, his eyes wide with bewilderment that George was standing right in front of him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Without a second thought, George rushed forward to wrap his arms around Dream, engulfing him in a hug. His grip tightened as he buried his head into his chest, letting out a shaky breath. Tears pricked at his eyes as he continued to hold on, he couldn’t believe he was here. The sound of Dream’s heartbeat in his ear caused George to tighten his grip, he never wanted to let go. He couldn’t handle this kind of loss again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Dream’s arm remained limb at his side as he processed George around his waist. The sound of George’s sobs vibrated into his chest. He was immobilized with shock, it all felt like a trick. There was no possible way this could be happening, it was too good to be true. But George’s tightened grip brought him back to the present moment, it was true.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His hands reached up to touch George’s shirt, the feeling of cloth beneath his fingertips calmed him. Grazing his fingers across George’s back, Dream left out a deep sigh, disbelief fading into oblivion. George pulled back, their eyes meeting with looks that neither could read.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We need to talk.” George whispered quietly, watching Dream with an intense stare.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i'm so sorry for the slow update! i hope you enjoyed this chapter. thank you all for over 2000 reads!! i appreciate it so much. shoutout to technoneverdies and lilacwashere for helping with this chapter :)! you guys are the best.</p>
<p>if you want to follow me on twitter, my username is @lagunaindigo. i post updates and such!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. now you see me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>george and dream have an important discussion.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>George released himself from Dream, standing back to give both of them space. The small moment they had shared was now gone, reality had returned. Dream shuffled his feet, avoiding eye contact. George continued to stare at him, watching him carefully as he observed Dream’s nervous movements. Neither dared to break the growing tension in the room as they stood there awkwardly in each other’s presence. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Moving farther away from George, Dream stretched his body to release himself of the encroaching hostility. The silence was stifling and he didn’t know how much longer he could handle it. He could still feel George’s intense stare on him, causing him to become uncomfortable as he attempted to regain some composure. His mind was blank as he scratched the back of his head, searching for what to say to George. There were too many words and not enough at the same time so he chose to say nothing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The discomfort displayed in Dream’s actions made George weirdly pleased with himself as he made it clear that he wasn’t going to let Dream talk his way out of what had happened. He had the charm of knowing how to lead a conversation in any direction he wanted it to go. With a few words and a sly smile, Dream could almost always get what he wanted. But today, he wasn’t going to slip through the cracks so easily.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dream continued to shift uncomfortably in front of George, his stare like a luminous show light that cast all attention on him under its burning gaze. The spotlight exposed his vulnerability as he was studied with painstaking detail. He silently pleaded to George that he would say something to rescue him from the scrutiny. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The standoff proceeded for several minutes before Dream could no longer bear it. Deciding to take the lead, he cleared his throat to alert his decision to break the silence. He stood still, squaring his shoulders to directly face George so he could not hide himself further. George didn’t muster any reaction to Dream’s sudden change in behavior.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You can sit down,” Dream gestured towards the couch in the living room, “I’ll get you something. I’m sure you’re tired.” The words came out awkward and unsteady. His voice held a soft tremor to it as he attempted to push off the unavoidable. With the emergence of George, came the emergence of facing the mess he had long ignored.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Following his suggestion, George moved to sit down on the coach. His footsteps echoed in the silent room, each step holding the quiet fear of anticipation. He had grown annoyed with Dream. How could he act so indifferent after everything that had happened? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What would you like? I have some pop and water. I can make you something to eat.” Like the tick of a clock in an empty room, his words vibrated with meaningless noise. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George let out a small laugh, it was almost unbelievable what they were doing. Dream avoiding the start of a difficult conversation and George daring to see if he would actually do it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dream cast him a curious look, hesitating before he said, “What’s the matter?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can’t believe after months of ignoring me, the best that you can say is ‘what would you like?’.” George spat the words out, they tasted bitter on his tongue. Months of waiting and desperation, endless nights of sleep deprived voicemails and anxious text messages for it all to lead to this. He wanted to scream, the anger boiling his blood hot. White spots appeared in his vision as he blinked rapidly, his fist clenching tightly together to hold back the rage threatening to escape him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The vicious tone that dripped from his words caused Dream to pause. He sucked in a sharp breath that cut the edges of his throat. Dream felt a cold fear settle over him as he studied George’s rigid jaw. Never before had he seen George so openly angry. He was used to the suppressed frustrations that revealed themselves in small cracks of George’s normally composed facade. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what to say.” He mumbled in a weak attempt to defend himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t know what to say?” George scoffed in disbelief, “You had fucking months to think about it while you ignored me.” Each word fell between them with an angry spark, igniting a flame to the delicate handling Dream had maintained since George’s arrival.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t know what you are talking about.” Dream shot back, his voice growing rough with defiance. His head turned to face George, their eyes meeting with animosity. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Like hell I do because it’s pretty obvious to me. You completely abandoned everyone, you abandoned me.” George’s words were gasoline thrown hastily on the fire, the flames only grew larger. A bigger division between them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There are things that you don’t understand.” There was an edge to Dream’s voice, warning George to not cross the imaginary boundary he had attempted to place.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then explain it to me so I can.” Desperation strained his words as he pleaded sharply. His voice booming throughout the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can’t. It’s too much.” Dream cast his eyes to the ground, shame blossoming in his chest. He couldn’t bring himself to explain. It was easier this way, to avoid, ignore, neglect. George would grow tired of trying and leave Dream alone so then he would never have to deal with it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re unbelievable.” George began to stand up from his spot on the couch, “I suffered for so long trying to understand why you disappeared. It was all I could think about. And then, I came all the way here to see you so I can have some peace of mind and you have nothing to say.” His eyes bore down into Dream’s shrinking character, daring him to look up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t ask you to come.” It came out as a low mumble but the implications of the words tore through them loudly. His tone was laced with a threat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They knocked back George into submission, his confidence was starting to fade. “Fuck you, I’m done.”, he choked out as he felt tears begin to prick at his eyes. To hide his emotions, George turned away from Dream. His feet carried him to the door in a pathetic march. Realization washed over him as he realized that this was it, their friendship was coming to end. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George hadn’t meant to let his anger get the best of him but without a second thought, the rage escaped him. Subconsciously, it was his attempt to show the pain he had been put through but all it had done was push Dream further away. He lowered his head in defeat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” It caused George to stop but he didn’t turn around, “I swear.” Dream watched George’s body tense, he suddenly knew that he couldn’t run anymore. This was his last chance to fix things otherwise it would be lost to time forever. He couldn’t let it end this way. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But you did.” George said back. His hand gripped the door handle tightly, his knuckles were turning pure white.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Everything got out of hand before I could stop it. I wanted to fix things. I just… didn’t know how.” A sob broke his speech, his cold defense was crumbling. He could see that George was angry, that he was hurt. His bitter tongue left stinging slashes that cut him deeply. He had only fought back with his blunt comments to push George to leave so he would no longer linger as a walking reminder of the pain he had inflicted. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Dream pulled further into himself as he began to cry silently. His hands shielded away his tears as he tried to comfort what little dignity he had left. The sobs haunted George as he continued to face the door, unsure of what to do. Memories of restless nights in mental anguish over Dream crossed his mind, encouraging his desire to walk through the door and never look back. But the presence of Dream right behind him planted his feet in the grounds of reality, it was a sobering call to why he had come all this way. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His mind recalled the conversation he had had with Sapnap about traveling to Florida to see Dream. He remembered how upset Sapnap was, how he had taken out his heartbreak on George. After the phone call, George had convinced himself to be understanding and patient with Dream, no matter the circumstances. Now, he was willing his mind to come back to that same conviction as Dream’s tears grew louder. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly, he shuffled around as he mentally prepared himself to reach Dream. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Patience. </span>
  </em>
  <span>His vision focused on the trembling figure who had curled into his hands as broken sobs shook his shoulders. A shaky breath consoled him as the melancholy sight caused tears of his own to slip down his cheeks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The couch creaked faintly as George sat down. His presence didn’t stir Dream who continued to bury his head in his hands. George placed his own hand on Dream’s leg as he began to rub delicate circles in hopes that it would comfort him. With his other hand, he gently pushed Dream’s face up to meet his. His voice grew soft as he whispered “What happened?”. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George’s breath caught in his throat as he observed Dream’s appearance. Emerald eyes cracked with red framed by long, darkened lashes glistened in the warm sunlight pouring through the window. A single tear trailed down his rosy cheeks as he peered timidly into depths of blue. George thought he looked woefully beautiful in the way a heartbreak promised a fresh beginning. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s a long story-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Dream, tell me.” His firm voice trailed into silence as Dream searched for the right words.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sucking in a deep breath, Dream wiped away the tears at his eyes, releasing himself from George. He cleared his throat, “The last time we properly talked, someone had made a hate account about me. There was a hashtag trending and everything.” He looked at George who nodded his head for him to continue. “So many people were saying things… and I don’t why this one thing got to me so much. But it did.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is that why you dropped everyone?” A loud smack filled the silence between them as George slapped his hand over his mouth, his face growing cherry red with embarrassment. Light giggles escaped Dream as the tension from earlier rolled off his shoulders. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was the start of it. I just deleted everything after that because I was so upset. Looking at it now, it was really stupid of me.” George didn’t say anything in response right away. He wanted to agree with Dream but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. No one had ever done such things to him so he had no idea how Dream must have felt in those moments. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s not stupid. Maybe a bit rash but not stupid.” Extending his arm, George replaced his hand on Dream’s shoulder to offer his support. He was here and he wasn’t going anywhere. He wanted Dream to see it so there was no doubt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess.” Dream huffed out, taking another deep breath. He looked at George curiously, searching his face for any adverse reaction but all he saw was a kind smile and expectant eyes. It filled his head with a warm ray of encouragement to continue. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So then, I took a break. I didn’t have twitter or youtube or anything. I tried to avoid my computer. I thought some time away from everything would allow me to recover and the hate to die down. But the longer I was away,” He abruptly stopped as his mind raced with all the reasons, it was overwhelming to recount, “the better I felt.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean?” George’s features were clouded with confusion. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The time I spent away from the game, from social media, it was nice. I didn’t feel this immense pressure anymore. I actually started to recognize myself.” Dream explained, his voice becoming rough with emotion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t feel like yourself?” The words fell from George’s lips in a whisper, afraid of what came next. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” He could feel himself starting to tear up again, “I lost myself. I could barely look in a mirror because I couldn’t stand what I saw.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George watched as Dream choked on his words, the tears made him indecipherable at times. A tremendous sense of guilt began to hang on George’s mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay. People change, it’s not a bad thing.” He whispered, trying to reach Dream through his tears.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s not okay. Everything had just gotten so much harder. It shouldn’t be like this.” Failure crept over him, trapping his mind in the cage of disappointment. He could no longer fight the feeling so he accepted it, collapsing to the ground with his weapons down in surrender. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Staring in horror, George gripped the rails of the cage, shaking them violently to awake Dream. He couldn’t let him fall like this, he needed to fight back. This would not be the hill he would die on.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay it’s not the same anymore.” Without another word, George wrapped himself around Dream, holding him as he wept. The sobs racking Dream’s body were muffled as George squeezed tighter, trying to console his friend, “I’m so sorry.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They remained like that, George hugging Dream as he continued to cry. Light flowed onto them through the window, burying them in rays of amiability. George rested his head on top of Dream’s as his hand rubbed soothing patterns over his back. Dream felt himself beginning to relax under George’s touch, basking in the comfort he had been longing for. In that moment, the broken shards of their friendship didn’t seem so sharp anymore. Dream felt the hope of their relationship rebuilding itself the longer George held him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A young boy raced by the front of Dream’s house, his steps full of an enthusiasm only found in the innocence of youth. George watched him longingly, wishing he could live with the blissful ignorance a child has. But as Dream shifted beneath him to wrap his own arms around George, it reminded him of the complex life he lived. Ignorance was bliss but it was also ignorance. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You shouldn’t be sorry.” Dream spoke into George’s shoulder, pulling his attention away from the window. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But I am. I had no idea what you were going through. I got so angry.” George could feel Dream shake his head. It tickled but George felt no desire to laugh. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t know because I didn’t tell you. I pushed you away, you have every right to be mad at me.” While still having his arms wrapped around him, Dream pushed his forehead against George’s so they were looking each other directly in the eye. “I’m so sorry for abandoning our friendship. If I could go back and change what happened, I would.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They stared at each other for a brief moment, taking in each other’s reactions. Dream’s eyes pleaded intensely at George, praying he wouldn’t turn away from him. George’s eyes were blank, concealing his emotions. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why didn’t you try to contact anyone?” Before George could accept any apologies, he needed to hear Dream explain. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“For a long time, I didn’t know what I was feeling. It was really confusing and I knew that if I reached out to someone, they would ask me questions that I didn’t really know how to answer.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George cut him off, “You could have just said that you didn’t feel comfortable talking about it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know that now. But once I started to figure things out, it had been so long. I was so embarrassed so I just ignored it, hoping it would fix itself.” A knowing smile appeared on George’s face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That seems to be your thing as of late.” He teased lightly, his forehead still pressured up against Dream’s. A perplexed look was cast upon George as Dream tried to understand what he meant. “You ignoring things.” George explained slowly, gesturing his hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh.” Vivid hues of red crept up Dream’s neck as he began to grasp what George meant. He was only slightly embarrassed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Dream’s phone started ringing, interrupting their conversation. He looked back at George sheepishly after he had seen who was calling him. “I need to take this.”, he said as he stood up to answer the phone. George watched Dream glide past him to the outside deck, shutting the slider door behind him. Dream visibly tensed as he clicked his phone, bringing it slowly to his ear. George wondered who was calling that would elicit such a response from Dream.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now that he was alone, George could begin to mentally recover from the long day. He sank back into the plush, gray couch, the pillows surrounding his sinking figure. His eyes scanned the room, taking in the interior. The walls were bright white that glimmered in the sunlight flowing through the extensive windows that lined one side of the room. A collage of picture frames lined the edges of a huge television across from  him. George could make out his blurry image in the reflection on the black screen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly, he studied the picture frames. Images of Dream and his family were the vast majority but there was some artwork from fans mixed in. One specific painting caught his attention. George’s avatar stood in the front, his arms extended before him like he was holding a camera for a selfie. His eyes were squinted as a wide, toothy smile decorated with rosy cheeks appeared on his face. Dream was standing behind him in the painting, with his head resting atop George’s. Dream’s mask fell barely below his nose as a soft smirk played across his face. To the left of George, Sapnap’s character peeked behind Dream’s with a broad grin that held hints of mischievousness. The artist captured a sense of jubilation that only pure friendship brings. George smiled sadly to himself as he remembered that they used to have that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His eyes drifted back to Dream, who was leaning against the railing on the desk. His eyes were furrowed together as he rubbed his temples with one of hands, the other holding his phone. It didn’t look like the phone call would be ending anytime soon. Deciding to make the most of his alone time, he pulled out his phone to call Sapnap. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George wandered away from the living room and into the kitchen. Cream colored cabinets accented with marble countertops and brown hardware greeted him as he entered. The kitchen smelled faintly of apples and cedar bark, a blown out candle sat in the middle of the counter island. He rounded the corner of the island and was now standing by the refrigerator, more artwork and pictures hanging from magnets. George ran his hand across the cold steel, taking in Dream’s collection for a moment before turning back to his phone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The phone laid heavy in his pocket as he reached down to grab it. He hesitated for a brief second, wondering if calling Sapnap would be the best decision. Their friendship had been rough the last couple of weeks, always on the edge of something greater that they struggled to hold at bay but he felt Sapnap would want to know. Pushing his doubt to the back of his mind, he unlocked his phone to dial Sapnap’s number. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His body twitched with anticipation as the booming ring rattled through his ear. George glanced around the corner to see if Dream was still outside, he was now sitting down on a chair, his back turned away from the door. Curiosity poked at his mind as he watched Dream, he had so many questions. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George had become so consumed in looking at Dream, he didn’t hear Sapnap answer the phone. His greetings became muffled in George’s obsession. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“George, hello? Is everything okay?” Sapnap asked, uneasiness evident in his tone. George whipped forward, letting out a giant sigh of relief at the sound of his friend’s voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sap, I saw him. I’m in Dream’s house.” George blurted out, his excitement getting the better of him. Without the added presence of Dream, George could relish in the accomplishment of his goal of coming to Florida: to see him. Sapnap let out a small huff full of disbelief, he couldn’t believe it either.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wow. You saw him.” He repeated slowly, reveling in the news. His astonishment was noticeable in his lack of words.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. There’s a lot you still need to hear but I wanted to tell you I’ve talked to him at least.” The sound of the slider door closing alerted George that Dream was inside again. On the other end, Sapnap hummed in response, his mind still processing the news. He had been so reluctant to George as he planned his trip to Florida but now he realized his doubt had been misplaced.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, I gotta go. I’ll call you later with more.” George whispered, feeling Dream’s presence linger behind him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright,” As George went to press the end call button, Sapnap’s voice stopped him, “Hey, George, I’m sorry for doubting you.” He sounded sincere, the most genuine he had been with George in weeks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay. I’m sorry too.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t be. Bye.” Sapnap laughed out, questioning why George was apologizing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, I am. Goodbye Sap.” He clicked the end button, slipping his phone back into his pocket. Dream now moved into his field of vision, moving to lean across the countertop opposite him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How is he?” The question was awkward in the way a person runs into their ex with a new partner. It should be fine but it’s not.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s okay. Things have been a little rough between us but I think they’re getting better.” He turned his eyes away from Dream’s, his body cringing over the unpleasant tension returning.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why are things rough?” It was a simple question but one that Dream should know the answer to. George searched for any escape from the conversation. He did not feel like talking about his friendship troubles with the root of the problem. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He didn’t think I should come see you.” He answered flatly, his voice devoid of emotion. Dream nodded slowly, hesitation playing at his features. George glanced at him for a moment, watching Dream ponder something in his head. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is he mad?” Dream knew it was a stupid question but he couldn’t help himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George’s face softened, “Yeah, he is.”. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Pulling himself up, Dream sat down on the counter to support himself. The admission crushed him, he needed to sit. Sucking in a deep breath, he let his head fall in defeat. It was foolish to believe that Sapnap would be anything but angry. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>George heaved his body up next to Dream’s, placing his hand over Dream’s hand gripping the edge of the counter tightly. “It’s gonna be okay. I’ll help you get through this.”, he murmured in Dream’s ear, a glimmer of hope igniting in his heart. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” A silent promise formed between them as Dream agreed to the help. As George clutched his hand, Dream decided the greatest mistake he had ever made was letting George go. There were many things he needed to fix but at least he had George back. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>long time no see! thanks for your patience, love and support. this chapter took a while to write between the start of the semester and writers block. but alas, i hope you enjoyed this chapter :) you guys are the best &lt;3</p><p>check out my <a href="https://twitter.com/lagunaindigo">twitter</a> !</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. to be lost or to be the one to lose</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>the tension is still high between george and dream as they attempt to navigate dinner.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Things had settled to an easy pace between them. It had been several hours since George had arrived and they were finally becoming comfortable with each other. Moments of awkwardness arose briefly but they managed their way through them the best they could. It almost felt like normal.</p><p>Faint sizzling noises crackled from the pan that Dream was cooking out of. His hand gently cracked open an egg against the edge of the counter, the vibrant, yellow yoke peeking at him. He stepped back as he dropped the egg in the pan, the oil hissing angrily over the warm flame. George glanced up from his phone, watching Dream tense at the noise. </p><p>Turning his eyes back to twitter, George idly scrolled through tweets as he awaited his dinner. Dream had offered to cook if George wished to stay. He happily agreed. </p><p>Dream shuffled the eggs around as they solidified under the heat. The bright yoke transitioned to a pale yellow the longer it cooked. A giddy feeling rattled in Dream’s bones as he relished in George’s presence. His mind found peace in the quiet kitchen filled with the soft fumblings of their mending friendship. </p><p>Murmured hums came from Dream as he continued to cook, drawing George’s attention to him. George observed Dream’s relaxed demeanor as he rocked back and forth to the tune of his humming. Admiration spread across George’s face in the form of a cheeky grin, he couldn’t help but smile. </p><p>“What song?” George’s voice stopped Dream, his body becoming still with the interruption. </p><p>“The Less I Know the Better. Tame Impala.” He turned around quickly, shooting George a smile before returning his focus to the stove. George nodded to himself as he attempted to recall the song. </p><p>“Hmm. I don’t think I know it.” George observed, his memory failing him. </p><p>“Warren showed it to me, I really like it.” The words fell from his lips with no regards. George’s head whipped sharply in Dream’s direction, the name ‘Warren’ throwing him off guard. Curiosity played at his features as mulled over who that could be.</p><p>“Who’s Warren?” George questioned, trying to maintain his composure as his mind clawed at the name.</p><p>“An old friend. He’s really great. You would love him George.” Dream’s answer gave no hint of recognizing George’s weird behavior. <br/>Envy blossomed in George’s stomach, bitter and obsessive. He felt it root in his mind, forever poisoning his relationship with Warren before he had even met him. George tried to push the jealousy down before it caused him to do something erratic. </p><p>“That’s nice.” He said through gritted teeth, his tone edged and shaky. Dream glanced behind him, casting George an odd look. George raised his eyebrows playfully, hoping it would soothe Dream’s questioning. </p><p>“Yeah…”, Dream’s face softened, “He’s helped me a lot with figuring things out.” </p><p>“You talked to him about everything?” George blurted out, his voice turning sour. He could no longer hold the jealousy back, it overtook him, powered by Dream’s admission.</p><p>“Yes?” Dream clicked off the stove, sliding the eggs off the pan and onto a plate. George glared at Dream, his chest rising with a growing rage that burned hot in his lungs. </p><p>“You told him before you told any of our friends, before you told me.” Envy rushed through his veins, his body going coarse as he spoke. It came as a whisper, timid and broken. He couldn’t allow his anger to become evident, he needed to be patient but it was so hard. </p><p>“George, he was different. I really don’t want to do this right now.” Dream clasped his hands together as he stood against the counter, opposite George. Exhaustion hung on his shoulders as he pleaded to George, another fight would kill him.</p><p>“How is he different?” George ignored his begging eyes, straining his eyes towards the plate. The fire was still burning inside him, he struggled to contain it.</p><p>“Warren doesn’t do youtube or twitch. He sees things differently than we do.” The excuse caused George to roll his eyes as Dream fumbled over his words, desperately trying to justify his words.</p><p>“Okay, whatever.” The bluntness of the statement pissed Dream off. He sighed deeply, closing his eyes to bite back the words that threatened to fall from his lips. </p><p>“Why are you doing this right now? I don’t see what the big deal is.” Each syllable filled the expanding void between them with a rigidness that barely revealed itself in Dream’s voice. His mask hid his frustrations well but cracks were beginning to form the farther George pushed him. </p><p>With a tight-lined smile, George let the silence console him for a moment. His anger was subsiding but it still laid ready to provoke at the wrong moment. Dream stood expectantly, allowing George to answer as his mind ebbed away his defensiveness so he could remain with a clear mind. </p><p>“Do you remember how we always promised we would be there for each other?” Dream nodded his head slowly, trying to comprehend where George could be going with the question.</p><p>“I thought about that promise every day we were apart. It was one of the only reasons I stuck around when everyone else told me to stop trying,” He explained, his eyes glowering into Dream’s with an intensity that lit his body on fire with a searing pain, “And I don’t why after everything you put me through, I could still believe that I was your first choice, that I would be the one you would go to.” His voice broke at the end, words shattering like glass hitting the hard ground. </p><p>“You are my first choice. You always have been.” </p><p>“But I’m not. I tried so hard to show you that I was there for you. I sent so many voicemails and messages to show you that you could reach out to me and you didn’t. Was I not good enough for you?” George shot back, his voice strained as the question fell into oblivion. </p><p>Dream paused, his mind too overwhelmed to formulate a response. The confusion riddled his mind, he couldn’t grasp why George was so upset. He had told Warren first because it was easier. Warren and him didn’t have the history like George and him did, their relationship was much less significant to him. He wanted to talk to George so badly that he feared it. George meant so much to him that he had rather left their friendship as how it was before his breakdown than return and ruin it.</p><p>“You’re different from Warren.” The words held steady and firm, supporting the weight of Dream’s statement, “I told him because he wasn’t you.” </p><p>George’s mouth scrunched up in confusion, his lips falling apart as he questioned Dream’s answer, “What does that even mean?” </p><p>“I wanted to tell you, trust me. But I was so afraid of what you would say, of how you would react,” Dream continues, “Warren didn’t know that I was ignoring everyone so it was easier to tell him because he wasn’t involved. I had to admit there was a problem to him before I could even think about talking to you.” </p><p>A silence fell over them. In the deepest parts of his mind, George knew that Dream talking to Warren first was better for everyone. He also subconsciously knew that the reason he was so upset with Dream was because he was jealous of Warren. Dream had always confided in George at his most vulnerable moments but to know that someone else had taken that privilege from George crushed his spirit. His selfish jealousy dominated his mind as he struggled to accept that Warren had taken his rightful place as the one that Dream would turn to for comfort.</p><p>“If I hadn’t shown up today, you would still be ignoring me so don’t tell me that ‘before I could even think about talking to you’.” George muttered, his tone dipping condescendingly at the end. </p><p>“God, George, can you stop picking apart my words for five seconds and listen to me?” Dream yelled, his voice booming loudly in the kitchen. George stared at him, his eyes wide in startlement. Dream had never talked to him like this. </p><p>“Sorry.” </p><p>“Like I said, I told Warren before you because it was easier. I had no idea what to say to get you back,” His voice straining on each word as he bore his eyes into George’s intensely, “I knew that I had already ruined our relationship, I didn’t want to make it any worse by saying the wrong thing. I was terrified to call you.” Feeling the gravity of Dream’s words, George allowed Dream to continue without interruption. “I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner, I really am. But you mean so much to George, I couldn’t handle the thought of losing you forever. I needed to work up the courage to reach out to you and that started with telling Warren.” </p><p>By this time, the eggs that Dream had cooked had grown cold. Dream’s speech hung in the air as both parties allowed the meaning to soak into their skin. A small flicker of satisfaction tamed the jealousy in George’s mind as he replayed Dream’s word in his mind. He felt horribly selfish. But his heart also skipped a beat with each word because he almost felt the same. </p><p>The thought of losing Dream terrified George more than he would like to admit. It was a nightmare he had only hoped to live in his sleep but then one day it became his reality. He understood Dream’s feelings in a different way. George had been the one to lose, not the one to be lost. He had tried desperately to find Dream who showed no interest in being found. The long months of searching hopelessly that laid behind him haunted his mind. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” His mind slipping back to long nights full of wondering what went wrong, “I guess I have a hard time understanding because I was the one on the opposite side.” </p><p>Dream sighed heavily, his body growing weak from the argument. He was emotionally drained. His body carried him slowly to the barstool next to George, clutching two plates of eggs with his last ounce of energy. The slight scraping of the porcelain plate across the countertop alerted George to the food being placed in front of him.</p><p>With a weak smile, George accepted the food. Dream nodded, his face expressionless as he looked back at George. </p><p>“No matter what you would have said to me, you wouldn’t have lost me.”  </p><p>“Is that so?” Dream responded before taking a small bite of food. </p><p>“Yes because I’ve already lost you once before. I wouldn’t want you to go through the same thing.” The tense atmosphere had grown calm as their argument had dissipated. Dream chuckled sadly.</p><p>“You sure know how to make me feel like shit.” Dream popped another piece of egg in his mouth, chewing slowly as he savoured the taste. George shook his head, rolling his eyes playfully as he eased into his explanation. </p><p>“I didn’t say it to make you feel bad,” George dragged his fork across the edge of the plate mindlessly, “I understand you were going through a lot mentally. I just wanted to remind you that you never lost me.” </p><p>“You won’t lose me ever again, I promise.” Dream’s hand circled around George’s, squeezing it tightly. George nodded, the reassurance warming his heart. He didn’t know if it would become another broken promise but for now he chose to not worry about it. The thought tucked itself in his mind, sorted away for another day. </p><p>---</p><p>The rest of the evening passed without occurrence. They finished their meal in a peaceful silence as they enjoyed each other’s company. The quiet offered a much needed moment of relaxation for both of them as they started to recover from the emotionally exhaustive day. </p><p>After Dream cleared away their dishes, he offered George a ride back to his hotel room. George politely declined, not wanting to end the night. Dream silently rejoiced as George asked if they could watch a movie before he left. The feeling of such simple bliss returning with ease with George around.</p><p>They settled upon Fast and Furious, a relatively mindless movie that didn’t require too much thought. Dream didn’t know if he had it in him to handle an emotional masterpiece. </p><p>George settled into the couch, allowing the cushions to surround him as he sat back. Dream moved right next to him, their knees slightly touching. He hadn’t felt human touch like this in a long time, it was comforting. It was a brief connection but it exhilarated Dream as he felt George’s knee rub against his whenever he moved. His heart raced as he was reminded every so often that George was right next to him after being without him for so long. Dream felt like a fool for getting so exciting over something so miniscule but at least he was a happy fool. </p><p>The movie played in relative silence as both boys were tired from the long day. Eventually, George began to drift off to sleep before completely passing out. His head was perched on Dream’s shoulder as he snored softly. A wide smile spread across Dream’s face as he shifted his body slightly to wrap his arm around George. </p><p>A few seconds passed as Dream captured the moment with his mind, taking in every aspect so he would never forget it. This was the most joy he had felt in months. He tried to not overthink it. </p><p>George pressed his body closer, snuggling his face deeper into Dream’s neck. Dream wondered if George was aware of his pounding heart. He had become giddy with nervousness, afraid he would awake George and ruin their small moment together.</p><p>Dream had a long road ahead of them but with George at his side, the journey didn’t seem so daunting.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>thank you so much for the support! i can't express how much it all means to me :) </p><p>i am planning out the rest of the book and i have decided on 15 chapters right now but that could very easily change. this is my first time writing a fanfiction on A03 so please be kind. i am really afraid that this book is confusing. so please let me know if the pace and storyline make sense. </p><p>if you enjoyed, feel free to comment :) it makes my day. if you any criticism or advice, please feel free to comment that as well. </p><p>follow my <a href="https://twitter.com/lagunaindigo">twitter</a></p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. you can't keep running</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Trigger Warning: Mention of Panic Attack</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The sharp glint of morning light awoke George out of his slumber. He shook his head softly, trying to knock himself out his groggy slumber. In an attempt to sit up, he felt arms locked around him, restricting his movements. Confusion of what was going on furthered the haze clouding his mind. The arms around him tightened their grip before George heard a faint sigh from behind him. Suddenly, he was keenly aware of his surroundings. He was in Dream’s house. He had fallen asleep on his couch and now he was stuck in his arms. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A memory of the previous night’s events replayed in George’s mind as he settled back into Dream’s arms. He remembered them turning on a movie and sitting down to watch it. “I must have fallen asleep.”, George mumbled to himself. An awkward feeling settled over him, causing his body to become stiff as he shifted around. He didn’t know how to feel about laying in his best friend’s arms at the moment. All he knew was it felt unnatural and confusing but it wasn’t scary. It was something he could almost grow accustomed to if he allowed it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George took a deep breath, trying to relax his rigid state. His mind was a mess, thoughts racing in a never ending loop. He could feel his heart pounding against his chest only adding to the chaos within him. It was becoming overwhelming, control slipping out of his grasp with each passing moment. His mind was walking on the brink of a panic attack, one wrong step and he would collapse. He could feel his body tremble as he desperately tried to focus on one thing to steady himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Dream’s arms</span>
  </em>
  <span>. They pressed around his waist, engulfing George in a small circle of warmth. Dream hadn’t loosen his grip since George had awoken, keeping his arms firmly placed around him. George focused his attention to Dream, feeling the rise and fall of Dream’s chest pressed against his back as he breathed in his sleep. George listened intently to the soft whistle that escaped from Dream’s nose as he took in another breath, fast asleep behind him. In a way, George found himself beginning to enjoy the feeling of being in Dream’s arm, the awkwardness having disappeared. The domesticity of it all calmed him, his mind becoming more stable. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How long have you been awake?” Dream mumbled, his words vibrating in George’s ears. It surprised George, causing him to become rigid again as he realized he was no longer alone. He suddenly felt embarrassed like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have done. Shame blossomed in his chest as he thought of how long he had been awake listening to Dream sleep. It felt wrong, creepy even but why did he enjoy doing it so much?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His secret admission sent his face diving into his hands, trying to hide the blush that was beginning to form. George could feel his face becoming hot, burning red with abashment. Dream giggled, pushing himself up to see what George was doing. A small grin etched across his face as he stared down in admiration, he had missed George so much. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s wrong, Georgie?” His voice teased, reaching out to remove George’s hands from his face. George squealed lightly, trying his best to hide his face as he pushed away Dream. The atmosphere was carefree and light, reminiscent of times long gone. Their troubles didn’t bother them for a brief moment as they playfully wrestled. All that existed in the room was George’s blushes, Dream’s laughter and the early morning sun. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Just couldn’t leave my arms, could you?” It was a jovial quip that slipped from Dream’s tongue without a second thought. The question should have fit into the atmosphere of the room with no trouble but it didn’t because things between them weren’t easy. Suddenly, George sat up, forcing himself off the couch. He backed away from Dream, an alarming urgency in his actions. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream fell forward on the couch, his hands catching himself with a loud thump. He looked at up George who stared at him helplessly, trembling as his hands clasped together tightly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, I…” George trailed off, knowing his words couldn’t explain what had just happened. When Dream asked his question, it caught George off guard. The peaceful illusion shattered as Dream acknowledged an unspoken truth between them. Sheer panic had set in as the implications of discussing their sleeping arrangement flashed in his head, causing George to get away as fast as possible. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A silence sat between them as Dream stood up, dusting his hands off on his pants. He looked at George for a long moment, his face indecipherable. George cowarded under the attention, shifting awkwardly as he waited for Dream to say something. His actions were reminiscent of when he first arrived at Dream’s house, his intense scrutiny of Dream as he desperately tried to remain normal. He could now almost understand Dream in that moment.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What happened?” Dream asked, his voice gentle as he softened his gaze. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I need to go back to my hotel.” He blurted out. Dream titled his head, giving George a questioning look. They both knew that wasn’t why George suddenly sat up but Dream didn’t press. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can give you a ride.” George nodded quickly, offering a smile to reassure Dream that everything was fine. Dream didn’t say anything in response, his own eyes hollow as he met George’s. A silent conversation passed between them as they remained still. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I know you’re lying. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>---</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The car ride was filled with the loud buzz of the highway and old songs on the radio. Neither made any attempt to have a conversation about what had previously happened. The tension was thick in the car, both of them aware of the bigger meaning of it all. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream wanted to talk about it but he’s scared. They’d already had so many hard conversations, why did this one feel so different? It wasn’t an explanation for his actions, it wasn’t a demand for an apology, it wasn’t even a tearful confession, this was new territory. It was a question that neither of them knew how to approach. It could define their friendship in a way Dream didn’t know if he was ready to face yet. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He glanced over at George, a solemn look on his face. With his body turned towards the window, George watched the world pass him by with an expressionless gaze. His chest fell with a heavy sigh, revealing himself to be deep in thought. Dream wished he could hear inside’s George’s mind, to understand what he was thinking. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George could feel Dream’s eyes on him, watching with careful observation. He continued to stare ahead, pretending to not notice the sudden attention. Dream’s staring didn’t feel uncomfortable, it felt endearing. George felt a token of appreciation for his silence, he didn’t feel like talking. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They remained in silence for the rest of the ride. Dream felt like he was on the precipice of asking the question the entire time, failing several times to take the plunge. As he stared over the edge of what lay below them, he felt frightened of the uncertainty that sloshed about in his stomach. He wanted to ask but something stopped him, George’s silence, a quiet hand pulling him away from the edge. George knows they need more time and this is how he told him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s the gray hotel to the left.” George mumbles, pulling Dream away from the edge indefinitely. Dream nods, flicking on his turn signal as he prepares to arrive at the hotel. The soft ticking of the blicker adds another noise to the endless silence that stretches between them. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Quickly, Dream pulls in front of the hotel, placing his car in park. George doesn’t move for a moment, remaining still in his seat as he waits. Dream sighs, it was only 10:30 AM but the day already felt long. They continued to play the waiting game, seeing who would make the first move. Who’s going to be the first to say goodbye?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, George turns to face Dream, sharing eye contact for the first time since they left the house. Dream’s face softens, offering a slight grin as he silently encourages George to speak. Maybe George would be the one to go over the edge. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you for the ride.” He whispered, reaching his hand towards Dream. In a swift movement, he clasped his hand tightly over Dream’s, squeezing it comfortingly. The touch burns Dream, sparking reminders of the previous night spent in each other’s arms. He so badly wanted to welcome the warm feeling that George gave him but when you play with fire, you’re going to get burned. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream pulled his hand away, using it to brush his hair away from his face. He looked at George cautiously, trying to hide his inner turmoil. A pained expression of hurt and confusion flashed across George’s face before the somber expression returned to his face. Clearing his throat, he turned towards the door to let himself out. Dream felt an inkling of regret start to form in his mind as he watched George step outside. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George turned around to Dream, challenging him one last time before he shut the door. Dream stared at him helplessly, a deer caught in headlights. Shaking his head, George slowly started to shut the door. He didn’t know why he would expect Dream to take initiative now after all he had done. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George, thank you for coming. It means more to me than you will ever know.” Dream said suddenly, pausing George in his tracks. Anticipation clung tightly to Dream as he awaited a response. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With a soft push, George opened the door. A timid smile played at his features as a faint blush tinted his cheeks. “Can I see you again tonight?”, he asked, a questioning glint in his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream nodded, “Text me when you’re ready.” George’s smile widened as he bid a final goodbye and shut the door. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>---</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After a long trek back to his room, George collapsed onto the bed. He had never felt so tired in his whole life. The journey here was tiring, but the destination crushed him. The next couple of hours was a welcomed break from Dream and all the confusion that came with him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In the car, George could tell that Dream wanted to talk about what happened last night and this morning. Dream tried several times to bring up his version of events but George took something from his playbook, ignoring the situation like it didn’t exist. George’s silence kept Dream at bay for the time being but he knew better than to expect Dream to not bring it up again. If something bothered Dream, he wouldn’t stop until it was resolved. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But George wasn’t ready to dive into anything with Dream. They had shared small moments of peace from the previous night before that helped soothe the rough edges of their friendship but it didn’t absolve Dream of his actions. Waking up in Dream’s arms doesn’t replace the sleepless night spent tolling over his abandonment, a small moment of laughter doesn’t replace the months of silence, none of it replaces the pain inflicted on him by Dream. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He hit the bed, his frustration overtaking him. Their little flirtation added another layer to the complex relationship George was struggling to understand. He knew there was something more between him and Dream, whether he wanted to admit it or not. But as George looked up at the ceiling, the white crown molding scattered above him, his reality stared back at him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Whatever he felt for Dream didn’t matter, he had come here to see Dream. He didn’t know what he would come to see at the time but he knew that Dream needed help. And now that he was, that was what mattered, helping Dream get better.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>--- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As George settled down in his hotel room, Dream was driving home trying to process his thoughts. He swerved sharply onto the road, trying to put as much distance between himself and George before he did something stupid. He knew that they had a lot to recover from and pushing George to talk would only create more distance between them. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In a quick attempt to calm down, he found himself calling Warren. He was the only other person beside George he felt comfortable confiding in. And at the moment, he desperately needed to talk to someone. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hello?” Warren’s voice sounded throughout the car, a welcoming solace to Dream’s ears.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Can we talk?” Dream asked immediately, his thoughts running wildly in his head. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course. What’s up?” The ever kind soul, Warren transformed instantly into the comforting friend,  concern overcoming him as he questioned Dream.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you remember after I called you yesterday about George coming to my house?” Warren hummed a faint confirmation. “Well, we ended up getting into another fight.” Dream’s voice fell flat as he tried to think of how to explain the fight to his friend. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“About what?” Warren asked, his words drawn out as he waited for Dream’s response.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Me?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes.” Dream muttered. Warren let out a small laugh, his amusement a stark contrast to the seriousness in Dream’s voice. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What did I do?” He sounded playful, a teasing question to lighten Dream’s mood.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George was upset that I talked to you before him. I tried to explain why and he seemed to kind of understand.” The words struggled to leave Dream’s mouth as he fumbled over his explanation. Warren made a small noise of consideration before going silent. “Then, we ate dinner and I put on a movie after.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You sound confused.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“He ended up falling asleep.” Dream suddenly felt shy, hesitant to admit what happened. Warren proceeded forward.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“When I woke up, he was in my arms.” A muffled noise came from Warren’s phone as he closed something near him. Dream felt a small blush appear on his face as he continued on his way home. He didn’t know what was happening to him anymore. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I see.” Warren became serious again. His response allowed Dream a moment to think. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“The whole thing was really weird. It felt oddly right, like this was how things were supposed to be. But I don’t know.” His voice trailed off as his mind began to wander. The admission of his feelings startled him as he fully realized what he had said. Warren said something to him but he didn’t hear it as he felt himself start to spiral. He couldn’t feel that way about George. He couldn’t allow himself to hurt George anymore than he already had. If the last few months had shown him anything, it was that he wasn’t even ready for himself. He had too much he had to fix before he could even begin to entertain those thoughts. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Dream?” Warren’s voice sliced through his concentration. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry, I was just thinking. What did you say?” He mumbled, a faint tremor to his voice. Dream could feel his hands shaking as he gripped his steering wheel tighter.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You might have felt that way because you guys haven’t seen each other in a while….” The advice offered a quick explanation to his thoughts. Dream agreed, it was the perfect excuse. “Or there might have always been something there.” The excuse crumbled in the palm of Dream’s hand.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t think so. We’ve always been friends.” Dream muttered in response, trying to offer another explanation. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Clay, are you hearing yourself talk?” Warren sounded in disbelief. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, of course.” His voice was unsteady as he tried to understand what Warren was getting at.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George flew to America after not talking to you for several months to see if you were okay. Normal friends don’t do that.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Best friends would.” Dream deflected, a soft nip at the end of sentence. Warren sighed into the phone as he listened to Dream’s denial.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George is more than a best friend to you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, then what is he exactly?” The question was venomous and hot, stinging Warren as he attempted to explain to Dream.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You already know.” Each word fell over Dream with deafening reality. He did know, he just didn’t want to admit it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It was nice talking to George but I feel things are awkward between us now.” Dream ignored Warren’s comment, something he does best. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Warren slammed his car door, the loud sound erupting through Dream’s car. He flinched slightly, the sound surprising him. “That was a good first step. You’ll figure things out along the way.” Warren said, his voice hopeful, offering his support to Dream.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You think so?” Dream’s voice was quiet. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Always.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After a few more minutes of conversation, Warren ended the phone call, leaving Dream alone. The rest of the car ride was spent mulling over the previous day's events and now his phone call with Warren. Dream had many things to think about, it was a kind distraction to all of things he still had left to fix. Yet as he entered his home, his eyes fell upon a picture of Sapnap and him. He couldn’t escape his problems forever, they always found a way back to him. He decided he would stop running by starting with the only other person more important than George.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream didn’t know how to approach Sapnap, he feared what would happen if he tried. From what George had said, he knew that Sapnap was angry with him, rightfully so. But how angry was he? Dream had thought that George would never wish to speak to him again and yet here he was. Maybe Sapnap wouldn’t react as harshly as Dream anticipated, maybe he was just overestimating things. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With a random stroke of confidence, Dream pulled out his phone. His fingers slid open the conversation with Sapnap, the last text message was from May, it was now the beginning of July. Sapnap had stopped trying to reach him after a while, he had given up. The thought hurt but Dream pushed forward, deciding to send a simple </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hey, how have you been?</span>
  </em>
  <span> A whooshing noise sounded from the phone as Dream hit send. His eyes scanned the screen in anticipation, fear and hope dancing together in his head.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A second later, the read notification appeared underneath Dream’s message. He sucked in his breath, his mind rampant with what Sapnap was going to say. The three little dots moved across his screen in mocking slowness, hiding the secret to what Sapnap was typing. But as quickly as the dots appeared, they disappeared, leaving a hollow feeling in Dream’s chest. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He let out a loud bark of laughter, finding humor in his hope for a response. Dream felt like a fool. He took one last glance at his phone, his eyes reading over Sapnap ignoring him. What perfect irony. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>--- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Several hours later, George was fast asleep. His exhaustion quickly overtook him and pulled him into the safe comfort of sleep. The warmth of his slumber shielded him away from the harsh truth of the real world for a brief second in time. It was feeling similar to how he felt in Dream’s arms. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But alas, all good things must come to an end. The booming sound of a text message broke George from his serene rest, the shield had fallen. He sat up begrudgingly, cursing under his breath as he reached to grab his phone. The bright glare of his screen blinded him as he attempted to see who had texted him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Why did Dream just text me?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George stared at the message, his mind still hazy. Dream had texted Sapnap. There was an auspicious curiosity in George’s mind as he responded. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t know. What did he say?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was early evening now, the sun starting its daily decline towards the west horizon. George pushed the covers off, deciding to freshen up as he waited for Sapnap to respond. He shuffled his way over to the bathroom, an idle ease to his walk. Soon, he would have to text Dream to come get him but he wanted to enjoy his isolation for a little while longer. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Upon entering the bathroom, he was greeted with the image of a man he didn’t recognize staring back at him. The man had disheveled hair that fell over red-shot eyes surrounded by plum colored circles of restlessness. He looked fatigued, like he hadn’t felt the blissful pause of rest in ages. George pitied him, it was a depressing reality. The man staring back at him wasn’t George or at least who George thought he was. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With a cold splash of water, George cleansed himself of the image. He would not allow himself to be that man. A shower and a change of clothes would be the first step. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>It said hey, how have you been? I didn’t respond. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George picked up his phone from the counter, reading it over briskly. He knew that Dream was going to be upset but he wasn’t going to fret over it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I understand. I’ll talk to him about it later. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A small flicker of hope ignited in George’s mind as he thought about Dream messaging Sapnap. The text was simple but it was a sign that things were starting to change. There was still so much that he had to work through and fix but to know that Dream was trying to make an effort made George feel like he was starting to accomplish the things that he set out to do. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sapnap and George exchanged a few more messages before George decided to take shower. He felt more prepared to see Dream now after talking with Sapnap. Their conversation about Dream reminded George of a simpler time when the three of them were still friends. Now, it was George serving as the middle man as he struggled to maintain both sides from collapsing. What had happened to their little trio?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>---</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After his shower, George had texted Dream to come pick him up. Within 20 minutes, Dream had arrived at the hotel, eager to see George. It was a stark contrast to when they had last seen each other. George hated the ever changing moods between relaxed or tense. He just wanted his best friend back but that wasn’t quite so simple. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you hungry?” Dream asked after George climbed into the car. He smiled at him, his demeanor bright and friendly. George felt himself start to question Dream’s change in behavior but he stopped himself. He was going to enjoy this moment, even if it felt fake. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George nodded his head, looking at Dream with a lop-sided grin. Dream’s eyes almost seemed to sparkle as he took in George’s expression. Maybe things didn’t always have to be so confusing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What would you like?” Turning forward, Dream refocused his attention on driving. He swiftly shifted the car in drive and pulled out of the parking, his hand gripping the steering wheel. George lightly tapped his fingers against his leg as he tried to think of a place to eat. A memory of Dream mentioning some restaurant called Mo’s in a stream flashed across his mind. He laughed softly to himself as he remembered how funny the stream was, he wished he could go back.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to try Mo’s.” A loud noise of excitement came from Dream as he listened to George. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hell yes.” Dream yelled, pressing his foot on the gas pedal to drive them faster to Mo’s. George giggled as he tightly clenched his seatbelt to hold on for dear life. Life passing them by in a blur as they raced ahead. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At lightning speed, they arrived at Mo’s and ordered. Dream teased George as he struggled to pronounce his order to the server, causing George to become flustered. He tripped over his words even harder as he listened to Dream explode with laughter across from him. The server gave him an apologetic look as she continued to write everything down, silently sending her condolences. Dream could barely breathe when it was his time to order, short bouts of laughter escaping him as he fumbled over his words. George shook his head, giving another look at the waitress as she finished, who giggled in return. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What the hell was that?” George huffed, wacking Dream lightly on the arm. The waitress had walked away but turned around to look at them, causing Dream to start laughing again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It was all in good fun, Georgie.” Dream patted George’s leg underneath the table, his touch smoldering to the core. The action surprised George, his body going rigid under the sudden contact. Dream didn’t seem to notice though as he removed his hand back to his own lap, too distracted by his own cackling. George, not wanting to draw attention to his discomfort, slowly pushed himself away from Dream to create another distance so they could no longer touch. He didn’t want to ruin the moment with his inability to handle Dream’s touch without freaking out. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George’s phone vibrated in his pocket, drawing his attention away from Dream. It was a discord message from Quackity, asking if he was ready for the stream. A gasp fell from George’s lips as he realized he had forgotten. He started to panic as he realized he didn’t have a computer to participate in the stream. He felt like an idiot, how could he have been irresponsible?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George, what’s wrong?” Dream asked, pulling George away from his phone. His face was serious as he watched George with concerned eyes, worry etched across the top of his forehead. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I forgot I had agreed to be on Quackity’s stream today. I don’t have anything to-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You can use my computer.” Dream cut off George. His offer eased some of the tension off of George’s shoulder, allowing him to catch his breath. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, yes. We need to get going.” George muttered softly, trying to calm himself down. Dream cast him one more worried look before calling over the server, asking for their food to go. The waitress nodded, rushing back to the kitchen as Dream turned back to George. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s gonna be fine. If you’re late, they can start without you. Quackity will understand.” He whispered to George as he tried to comfort him. All George could muster was a nod as he continued to take deep breaths, his hands shaking as he pulled out his phone to message Quackity. It was going to be okay. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They waited for several more minutes until the server arrived with their food. Dream continued to comfort George, distracting him with small stories and encouraging words. It calmed George, keeping his emotions at bay so he wouldn’t drown in them. On the car ride home, George was quiet as he anxiously checked the time. Quackity reassured him there was no rush but he still felt pressure, created by his own doing. Dream didn’t say much either, instead turning on the radio and quietly singing along to any song that played. George settled back into his seat, listening to Dream’s voice as a relaxing distraction to his buzzing mind. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once arriving at Dream’s house, George raced inside. Dream followed closely behind him, food in tow. The anxious pressure that bubbled in George’s chest burst as he logged into Discord, it was a welcoming site. He felt like he could finally breathe again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Faint ringing came from the headset leading against the monitor as Quackity called him. George happily picked it up, letting out a sigh of relief as he heard his friends on the other end. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George, my man, what took you so long?” Quackity teased as he welcomed him onto the stream. George laughed, trying to decide what his excuse would be.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, I know. I was going to get food.” George felt it was good enough, it wasn’t a total lie. As the other people on the discord call started to talk, he logged onto his Minecraft account to join the server. The familiar screen loading screen greeted him kindly, his own little escape from reality.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What did you guys get?” Karl asked on the other end, his character standing right in front of George’s as he loaded onto the server.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Without a second thought, the words slipped right out, “We got Mo’s.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh, sounds like the restaurant that Dream talked about one time.” Quackity said, paying no attention to George’s sudden silence. He felt his eyes grow wide as he realized what he had just said. No one knew that George was in Florida except for Sapnap and he would like to keep it that way.  George lightly hit himself on the head for almost slipping up. He didn’t even want to think about what would happen if anyone else found out about George being with Dream.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The fans had finally started to accept that Dream might not be coming back. The previous onslaught of messages asking about Dream had seemed to lessen as time dragged on. George was silently grateful because at the time, he didn’t know how many more reminders of Dream he could take. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh, yeah, I don’t know. It’s just a local restaurant in my town.” George laughed nervously, his awkward behavior ignored as Quackity started to explain what they were doing on stream. Muting himself, George took a deep breath before tuning into what was going on. For the stream, they were going to be having a duet competition with the partners being Karl and Quackity, Skeppy and Bad and Sapnap with George. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George felt himself relax as Quackity continued his introduction. He was looking forward to what the rest of the time would entail, his food long forgotten. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Down the hall, Dream was sitting alone as he had left George by himself after helping set up the computer. He chewed mindlessly on his food, staring ahead at the cabinets in front him. The quiet atmosphere was depressing but Dream had grown accustomed to it the last couple of months. Him and solitude had grown quite close, he considered it a friend. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Clamorous laughter filled the hallway as George responded to something on the stream. Jealousy nipped at Dream but he shoved it aside, he had brought this upon himself. He continued eating his meal, attempting to find enjoyment while sitting in the stillness of an empty room. Dream didn’t want to disturb George as he worked but the longer George’s laughter resounded through the house, the greater the temptation became to ignore. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, he couldn’t fight it anymore. Dream picked up his plate and headed towards his bedroom, George’s voice becoming louder as he approached. George was singing, brash and boisterous. Dream couldn’t help but giggle as he slipped inside, moving to sit next to George on the floor.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George quickly whipped in his direction, caught off guard by Dream’s presence. His voice paused as he recovered from the sudden fright. Dream could hear Karl say something through the headphones as George returned to singing, his voice quieter than before. He averted his eyes away from Dream who was staring at him intently, enjoying the performance. Even though Quackity was live to over 100,000 people, Dream’s attention made George become incredibly shy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With a few more words, George finished the song. Dream clapped softly, giving George a cheeky grin as he blushed. He didn’t want to give Dream the satisfaction of knowing that he had that effect on George so he decided to ignore him by switching the audio from the headphones to the speakers. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream returned to eating his meal as he watched George on the stream. He quickly learned that Sapnap and George had been singing together and that Karl and Quackity were the judges. From the sidelines, Bad and Skeppy cheered on their performance. Dream laughed quietly as Quackity made a joke about George’s horrible singing, rating it a solid 6/10. A deep sense of nostalgia came over him as he continued to listen to his old group of friends joke around. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Haunting memories from old streams flashed through his mind as the sound of their conversation droned on in the background. Each memory became blurry and frayed as it faded from his view, disappearing into the void. Those times seemed so distant that Dream could barely recognize them. The actuality of all that he had lost played out right before him as he listened to what remained of his old life. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George, is everything alright?” Karl asked, his question catching the attention of Dream as well. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, just a bit tired is all.” George shot Dream a look, silently asking if he was okay. He had noticed the way Dream seemed to zone out, his eyebrows furrowed in thought. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream nodded, putting up a quick thumbs up. He was going to be as okay as he could be. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The rest of the stream passed without incident for the next half an hour. Dream watched the remaining duets, struggling to contain his laughter. He was pleasantly enjoying himself, even though he felt like an outsider to his own friend group as he watched from the audience. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, Dream could tell that Sapnap had grown tired of the singing as he began to hit Quackity’s character repeatedly. George turned his character towards them as the sound of string being pulled back vibrated from the speakers, an arrow suddenly knocking him away. Skeppy and Bad continued their duet, their voices harmonizing in the worse ways possible. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George quickly moved his character back towards Quackity, who was now running away from Sapnap. Short comments of annoyance were hurled at Sapnap who repeatedly hit at Quackity with a mischievous laugh. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you just fucking disappear like Dream?” The call grew silent except for the instrumental playing in the background. No one knew how to react, it was too soon. Maybe it would never be soon enough. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dream felt his heart drop as Quackity’s comment tauntingly replayed in his head. It was a stab in the heart, a punch in the gut, it hurt in a way he didn’t quite understand. He knew his friends might be angry with him but with the ease Quackity made the joke, it felt like they didn’t even care. His presence was no longer a bother. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He didn’t care to listen to the rest of the stream. Dream stood up swiftly as George looked at him with pleading eyes.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Dream, wait, I’m sure he didn’t mean it.” George grabbed Dream’s hand, stopping him from walking any further. He sucked in a deep breath, closing his eyes as he tried to convince himself to not pull away.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s whatever. I don’t care.” The lie slipped through his teeth, deflecting his emotions away from George. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes you do.”  His voice was firm as George pulled on Dream’s hand, attempting to turn him around so they faced each other.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Please let me go. I don’t want to do this right now.” There was an edge to him, warning George to not push any further. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You can’t keep doing this,” George let go, Dream’s hand hit his side with a soft thud, “Walking away doesn’t help anything.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There isn’t anything wrong, George. Why can’t you just accept that?” Dream yelled, anger starting its vicious course through his veins. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Because I know it’s not true. I know what he said hurt you.” George shot back, his tone matching Dream’s. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Why does it matter? He obviously-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Karl’s voice cut Dream off, “George, you’re not muted.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George closed his eyes, sucking in a sharp breath. A sharp chill ran through Dream’s body as the truth caved in on him. Over 100,000 people had just heard their conversation. He dreaded to think what the reaction would be in the morning. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh my god.” It was the only thing George could muster out as he tried to process Karl’s words. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Neither of them moved for a second. George stared at Dream, begging him to do something. He wanted to melt into the floor. Dream looked between George and the door, a metaphorical fork in the road.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry. I can’t do this.” Dream wasn’t ready. He gave George a sheepish look, escaping through the doorway. With each step, his mind screamed at him, </span>
  <em>
    <span>You are a coward. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>George couldn’t move as he watched Dream walk away. His mouth hung open, frozen in shock. He would have to clean up this mess on his own. Dream had left him to the wolves.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“George?” Sapnap asked, he sounded small, afraid of the answer to his question. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m- I- I’m here.” His tongue sputtered over the words as he struggled to correlate a sentence.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you want to-” George noticed that Quackity had muted them so the audience could no longer hear.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes. I’m sorry about that. Can we please just ignore it?” He cut off Sapnap, eager to move on. George didn’t want to think about what the audience had heard or the way Dream had left him alone. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course.” Sapnap mumbled, concern etched between his words. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Someone typed into the chat that they were ready again, George didn’t know who. His mind was too occupied to notice. Quackity looked at his computer, visibly gulping as he nervously unmuted his friends. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, how do we come back from something like that?” Quackity questioned awkwardly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I really don’t think you can.” George responded, a laugh of disbelief trailing behind his statement. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>thank you for the continued support :) it means so much to me. this is the longest chapter yet so i hope it was worth the wait. please feel free to comment any thoughts, i read every single one. they make my day a thousand times better. xx</p>
<p>follow my <a href="https://twitter.com/lagunaindigo">twitter</a> for updates :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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